Rage Wars
by IRuleEverything101
Summary: After two new employees join the workforce at the park, Mordecai and Rigby find themselves at the end of thier ropes when all they do is argue with the newcomers. 2 OC's and that's it. Mordecai/OC Rigby/OC! Reviews are appreciated! Also, the pic was done by CrystallizedTwilight on DA!
1. Chapter 1

**Basically this is based on a dream I had on a bus ride from VA back to NY. Later on there will be making out involved, a lot of arguing, um...other stuff probably. That's all I can think of right now. :)**

**Oh right. Instead of being animals and such, everyone will be human. Also, there will be cursing in this fic! Hope that doesn't offend anyone!  
**

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"Alright everyone, settle down." A tall man with thinning red hair said as a group of young and not so young men sat on the front steps of a large house. He had a clip board in his hands and was dressed in a gray shirt under a red vest and black slacks. "I've got some announcements to make here, and we don't have all day."

"You know who does have all day? MY MOM!" Muscle Man yelled, closely followed by a yell and a high five to his best friend and partner in crime, a small pale man with light blond hair and gray eyes. With him always wearing the color white, and always on the receiving ends of high fives from Muscle Man, he earned the nickname Hi-Five Ghost.

"Yes, I'm sure Muscle Man." The red vested man said with a sigh. "Anyway, since it seems I can't trust some people with the job at the snack bar," He shot a glare to the two youngest members there, a tall man with blue and black hair, his pale and lanky frame covered by a blue and white hoodie and black skinny jeans and a shorter thin man that had brown hair that stood on end, wearing a brown long sleeved T-shirt with black horizontal stripes on the sleeves and black skinny jeans. Both had on black tennis sneakers that were beyond repair. They both shot the red haired man apologetic smiles, but he glared harder at them. "I've decided that we're going to hire some new people to work there permanently, as well as help out with house chores and extra odds and ends." He looked down and rifled through his notes on the clip board for a second before looking back up. "Questions?"

"Wouldn't that mean we don't get payed as much?" Rigby asked as he lent into the stairs.

"Rigby's right for once Benson," The blue and black haired man said. "If more people come to work here, we'll be the ones losing out."

"Your pay isn't the concern here, you two." He said loudly, his cheeks starting to get red. "And if you two hadn't eaten all that food and made Mr. Maellard buy more so soon, WE WOULDN'T BE HAVING THIS CONVERSATION!" He panted as he tried to calm himself from the out burst.

"Oh goody, I just love meeting new people, don't you all?" Pops said with a giggle and a clap while Skips grunted and sat back to wait. "Oh do tell us Benson, when do they get here?"

"They should be here in a few more minutes." He told them looking down at his wrist watch.

"Ugh, this is lame!" Rigby said as he sighed loudly.

"It totally is. This means all of us are gonna get pay cuts." His friend Mordecai said as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Yeah, and it's your fault you losers! Now we all have to suffer cuz of you!" Muscle Man said shoving Mordecai into his shorter friend.

"Hey quit it, man!" Mordecai said as he shoved him back while Rigby tried to climb over him to reached the heavier man.

"STOP PLAYING AROUND!" Benson yelled and the three of them stopped. But they weren't looking at Benson. He frowned again and was gearing up to yell again when Pops said, "Oh, hello ladies. Can we help you?"

He turned and let out a breath of air, putting on a smile that seemed a little forced. "Oh, yes, hello! Did you two find it here alright?" He gestured them over and the pair shuffled over a little awkwardly.

The two of them were a slightly odd pair, the one on the left being the shorter of the two. She had caramel colored skin, and she had piercings in her face, two on either side of her bottom lip and one stud in her nostril, all silver in color. She had her hands in the pockets of her black skinny jeans, and she was top heavy, which was obvious when you looked at the size of her chest that was covered with an Avengers T-shirt. She had an open red plaid button up over her shirt, and her hair brushed her collar bone in the front, colored black with blonde streaks all through it. Her eyes were a dark brown and heavily rimmed with eyeliner behind her black framed glasses, and she gave off the look that said, "Don't fuck with me and I won't fuck with you."

The girl on the right was taller than the first, but not by much. She was pale, with no notable piercings like the first girl. She had on boot cut blue jeans that covered most of her feet and dragged behind her on the ground, and also had on a plaid shirt, buttoned to the second button from the top showing off a little cleavage. Her dark brown hair was pulled up in a high ponytail and her eyes were the same dark brown as the first girl's, but she only had on a bit of eyeliner and eyeshadow. She had silver rimmed glasses that she pushed up her nose every few seconds, and she wasn't looking anyone in the eye, instead looking at the ground or behind them.

They all turned back to Benson as he started to speak. "Guys, this is Mani," He pointed to the shorter one who raised a brow as she looked at each of them. "And Alex." She looked up long enough to wave at them, which only Pops returned, before going back to looking at anything else but them. "Let's give them a warm welcome now." He glared at them, mainly Mordecai and Rigby, while Pops, Skips Muscle Man and Hi- Five Ghost went over to introduce themselves.

Rigby scoffed as he stood and looked down at Mordecai, "Man, this blows. What can a bunch of chicks do?" He whispered to Mordecai.

"Man, that's kinda wrong." He replied with a shake of his head. "But it will be hard having some chicks around. And what's with the short one's shirt?"

"Excuse me?" The short girl, Mani, spoke up walking over to the two and standing in front of them.

"Huh?" Mordecai asked as he looked up at her.

"You said something about my shirt." She said pointing to it. Mordecai looked down where she was pointing and stared at her chest for a moment too long. "I wanna know what's wrong with it." She spoke again, making him look back at her face. Her angry face.

"Well, I was just telling my friend here that Avengers suck. I mean everyone knows that the Avengers are just a bunch of normal people, one angry guy and a Norse God running around NYC. What's so great about them? They don't even leave the city." He said as he stood up and towered over the girl.

She started breathing heavily and would've launched herself at Mordecai if Alex hadn't have moved closer and held onto one of her arms.

"Mani, we really really need this job. Remember what I told you about waiting for the right minute?" She said lowly so only Mordecai, Rigby and Mani heard her. The two males tried to take a step back, but tripped and fell back against the stairs, falling down the rest of them and straight into Mani and Alex. Mordecai and Rigby landed on top of them and groaned before they tried to roll off of them.

"Ugh, get offa me! You both smell! Disgusting!" Mani yelled as she started to flail around. She was trying to push the tow off of her so she could get off of Alex, but she was tangling them up more.

"What? Shut up, we showered last night!" Rigby yelled back. He grabbed something and Alex let out a short scream that had him trying to jump back. Suddenly they were both pulled off the girls by Skips and they heard Benson simultaneously apologizing to the girls and yelling at them to get to work. They ran off after yelling out a quick sorry themselves, and didn't look back until they didn't hear anyone from the house anymore.

"Man, what was here problem?" Rigby asked as they started to walk around. It was technically their day off, but they had to stay for the meeting.

"Man, I don't know. But let's head over to the Coffee Shop. We got nothing to do here anyway."

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**Co-Authored with ManiDeMalice, my best friend in the world :D**


	2. Chapter 2

**Another day, another chapter :3**

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"Oh hey guys!" Mordecai smiled and Rigby rolled his eyes at his taller friend.

"H-Hey Margret. What's up?" He asked as they went to take their usual seats. The red headed woman went behind the counter and came back with a mug of steaming coffee for Mordecai and a can of cola for Rigby.

"Oh nothing much, just for some friends of mine to come and visit. They moved away during our sophomore year of high school and everything. We've kept in touch through e-mails but I haven't seen them in like forever." She explained as she tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear.

"Ugh, lame." Rigby muttered but groaned in pain when Mordecai elbowed him in his side.

"Don't listen to him, it sounds great Margret. And they're probably nice and sweet like you Margret." He said with a goofy smile adorning his face.

"Well, I wouldn't say that." She answered with a laugh. Then the door opened behind them and they heard someone muttering something. Margret turned to greet them and leaped up with a shout. "Omigod! Alex, Mani! It's so good to see you guys again!" She cried as she ran to hug them.

Mani cringed when Margret got close enough to hug them and with a grimace set in place, opened her mouth to say, "Oh hey, Margret. Awesome."

Alex let out a giggle and opened her arms to hug the other woman. "It's great to see you again too, Margret. How have things been?"

As they talked, Mordecai and Rigby stared as the three of them interacted with each other. "Dude, what the hell's going on here?" Mordecai asked Rigby.

"They're trying to take over our lives!" Rigby staged whispered. "Let's get outta here before-."

"Hey guys, I want you both to meet some friends of mine." They heard Margret say as she turned and lead them over to the table Mordecai and Rigby where sitting at. "This is Ma-."

"Hey, you're the douche bags we work with!" She said when she looked away from Margret and towards Mordecai and Rigby. "And you! Midget guy!" She said pointing at Rigby. "You grabbed Alex's boob! And you didn't even take her to dinner first. The nerve!"

Margret frowned as Alex's face lit up and Rigby stood up and yelled, "I didn't mean too! And who'd want to touch her boob anyway?! She wears glasses for Christ's sake! GLASSES!"

"FOR SHAME! There's nothing wrong with Alex's boobs, and there's nothing wrong with glasses! I wear glasses, and there's nothing wrong with me! I mean, I'm pretty sure there's nothing wrong with but you wouldn't know that cuz you're not my friend and you'll never be my friend because you suck and you're too short and your stupid brown shirt is stupid and-!"

"Whoa whoa, calm down Mani!" Margret said as she led her to a chair.

"You're gonna give yourself a panic attack." Alex said as she picked up a discarded dish towel and started fanning her. "And quit talking about my boobs." She hissed with a scowl.

"A bloo bloo bloo! A bloo bloo bloo!" Mani cried out as she fell against the table.

Mordecai and Rigby looked at each other before Mordecai looked at Margret and asked, "Uh, what's she doing now?"

"You idiot, I'm crying!" She said lifting her head up and looking at the two of them.

"Wha-? But you're eyes aren't even wet!" Mordecai said with a frown.

"Shut up, ass face! A bloo! A bloo bloo bloo!"

"You make absolutely no sense." He told her with a head shake.

"Hey, shut up Mordecai and quit picking on her." Margret said.

"Yeah, ass face. Quit picking on me." Mani chimed with a grin on her face.

"What? But she's, and I-."

"I told you, taking over our lives!" Rigby whispered again, this time shaking his head.

"Hey, I know what'll cheer you up!" Margret said getting their attention. "A party!"

"Wait, what?" Mani asked sitting up straight, completely forgetting her crying.

"What party?" Mordecai asked as his face held a hint of hope.

"I was gonna throw a party tomorrow night at my new apartment anyway, and now I'm inviting you two. It'll be awesome!" She said standing up. "Hold on, I'll write down my address so you don't get lost or anything."

"Um, Margret, what about me and Rigby?" Mordecai asked quickly. "Y'know...like, are we invited?"

"Hm?" She asked turning to look at them. "Oh yeah sure. I guess so." She said before going in the back to find something to write on. "I'll be back in a minute guys."

Forgetting about the others watching him, Mordecai jumped up and started to dance with a, "Yes! This is fucking awesome!"

"Wait, I'm still confused. What party?" Mani asked looking at Alex.

"Yeah, I bet you would be confused." Rigby muttered crossing his arms. Alex sneered and kicked at his stool knocking him off of it. He glared at her but she ignored him.

"Margret's party." She answered her friend as Mordecai continued to dance around. "She invited us and those two idiots."

"Who are you calling an idiot? You're the idiot, with your glasses!"

"Do you have any idea how cretinous you sounded just now? What kind of half-wit are you? I wear glasses because I have problems with my eyesight, you unenlightened cretin." She said.

Mordecai stopped dancing and he looked at Rigby's blank face, then at Alex.

"Did you just call me stupid?" Rigby asked quickly.

"Ooo, BURN!" Mani yelled out right before Mordecai let out an, "OOHH!"

"I'll kill you!" He yelled as he made to leap across the table. Mordecai grabbed him in mid-air and pinned him to the floor.

"Hey guys, I wrote down the address for you." Margret said as she emerged from the back of the store. She looked at both males on the floor and blinked. "Um...guys?"

"Huh, oh Margret!" Mordecai said looking up at her. "Um, Rigby, uh, was choking and I had to give him... mouth to mouth?"

Mani was holding her sides laughing, as Alex shook her head at their display. "I'll take those." She said holding her hand out for the copies of her address. "I'll make sure those two bozos get them when we get back to the house."

"Oh cool then." She said placing them in Alex's hand. "Party starts at 8, but you two should come by earlier, I can help you with your make-up and stuff." Another customer came in and she sighed. "Well, I guess it's back to work for me. See you guys tomorrow night!"

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**Co-Authored by Mani De Malice**


	3. Chapter 3

**Another day another chapter! X3**

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"Come on Rigby, I don't want to be late for the party." Mordecai said from the door way of his shared bedroom.

"What? It's only a few minutes to 7. I thought it didn't start till 8." Rigby asked looking up from his comic book. He saw his friend was dressed in a blue button up that was missing the top button and a black tie that hung loosely around the collar of the shirt. He had on a slightly cleaner pair of black skinny jeans then from an hour ago, and when he came into the room, Rigby could smell some kind of cologne on him. "Ugh, you kinda smell." He said waving his hand in front of his face to ward off the smell.

"Shut up. And get dressed already." He said throwing him a dark brown button up.

"Why?" He whined as the shirt landed o his head. "It's only...not 8."

"Because dude, those new chicks don't know how to get to Margret's." He said, as if that explained everything.

"Yeah, and?" He said taking his T-shirt off and slipping the button up on.

Mordecai sighed, as if he couldn't believe his friend could be this stupid. "AND! They'll need a ride there, and they have to be there by 7. So if we give them a ride, then we'll be there at 7. Meaning that we'll be there earlier than everyone else, meaning that I can make my smooth moves on Margret." He said with a grin before turning to their dresser and grabbing a bottle of Febreze. He walked back over to spray some on Rigby.

"Ugh, quit it!" He said as he held up his hands to protect his face.

"No way dude! You reek and there's no time for you to shower." He heard something out in the hallway and ran to the door. He saw Mani and Alex locking the door to their room and said, "Uh, hey, um...do you guys need a ride?"

They both looked up and Alex decided to say, "You want to give us a ride?"

"Yeah. To the party." He looked at them and frowned. "Is that what you're wearing?"

Mani rolled her eyes. "There's nothing wrong with my outfit, ass-face." She said matter-of-factually. She was wearing a black zippered hoodie over a plain hot pink V-neck shirt and clean black skinny jeans. She had put on some eyeliner and her eyelids were now dark pink while her lips were shiny.

Alex, on the other hand, was wearing a plain white T-shirt and the jeans she was working in earlier. She hand a plastic bag with clothes stuffed in it and didn't have any makeup on. "I'm going to change when I get there." She explained as she started to walk past the taller man. Mani followed quickly behind her and Mordecai walk behind them, with Rigby rushing after his friend.

"Hey, you better not be looking at my ass." Mani said as they walked down the stairs.

"What ass?" Mordecai asked as he followed them. Rigby and Alex laughed and Mani blushed while pushing her friend down the last few steps. "Anyway," Mordecai said leading the way to the cart. "Let's get going, or we'll be late."

"Wait, you're gonna drive? In that?" Mani asked as they stopped in front of the golf cart while Alex rolled her eyes.

"Yeah. Is there a problem?" Mordecai asked as he took out the keys and climbed in.

"'H' to the nizz-o! I am not riding in some ghetto ass cart." She said crossing her arms and frowning at the cart.

"Why not?"

"Because!"

"Because why?!"

"Because! Besides, I don't want to go anywhere with you. If I show up and you're with me people will be all like 'Ugh look at that loser with the blue hair.' and then they'll be like, 'Oh crap, Mani's with that loser with the blue hair, she must be a loser too.' and I'll be all like, 'Alex are those people talking about me?' and she'll be all like, 'Hang on I have to clean my glasses.' and then I'll be waiting and you'll be like..." Mani stopped speaking for a moment, rubbing her chin and glancing around at the others standing around. "Wait, what was my point again?"

"You don't want to ride in the cart." Alex said climbing in the back seat.

"Yeah! F that ish" She stared at the others in the cart. "Midget you better move, I don't sit in the back." She said.

"Mani, just come on." Alex whined.

"Yeah, quit being difficult and get in." Mordecai said.

"What they all said." Rigby chimed in.

"Hey! Shut the fuck up! If I wanted to hear you speak, I'd throw a cat in wood chipper. Douche bags!" She shouted getting in the back with Alex.

* * *

"Hey guys! Glad you could make it!" Margret said as she opened the door. She gestured for the group of four to come inside. "Nice and simple as always Mani." She said when she saw the short girl's outfit.

"Yeah, well...yeah." She replied with a shrug, her expression stoic.

"Hey Margret." Alex said with a smile as she crossed the threshold. "Can I, uh, change in the bathroom?"

"Sure, I'll show you where. You guys make yourselves at home, 'kay?" She said before leading Alex towards the bathroom.

"Okay, sure Margret." Mordecai said before looking around.

"Ugh, lame!" Rigby said as he sat on the couch. "This party is lame!"

"No it's not." Mordecai said quickly. "The party didn't even start yet."

"Man whatever." He replied. "It's a bunch of chicks, it's gonna suck."

It was silent for a few minutes before Alex and Margret walked back out. They had both changed, Margret wearing a dark red baby doll shirt and denim short shorts, her hair in her usual spiky style. She had red-ish eye shadow on her lids with just a bit of eyeliner and her lips were bright red and glossy. Alex had slipped into a purple tank top and they could see two tattoos on her shoulder, on of a blue butterfly and the other of a rose spider. She had on a black mini skirt and a pair of black ankle boots. She had put some eyeliner and purple eye shadow on, as well as a little blush on her cheeks and her lips were a shiny purple.

"Nice." Mani said when she saw the both of them.

"Thanks." Margret said heading for the kitchen. Alex smiled and sat next to Mani as Rigby sneered.

"So, how long do we have until you steal our lives, you life stealing shrews!" Rigby sneered as he looked at them.

"I'm surprised you know what a shrew is." Alex commented with a raised brow.

"Dude, me too." Mordecai spoke up.

"Well, we learn something new about each other every day. Good for us." Mani said as she laughed at the short male.

"SHUT UP!" He yelled as he stood up.

"Hey now, what's going on in here?" Margret asked as she came back into the room with a few bottles in her arms.

"Oh, nothing Margret. We were just um, playing a game." Mordecai told her.

"Oh okay." She said before one of the bottles slipped from her arms. "Oh dammit." She put the rest of the bottles in an ice filled cooler then ran to get a broom, dust pan and some paper towels. Alex moved to help her and Margret told her that she had it handled and to sit back down.

As Margret was bent over, Mordecai turned to say something to her but got an eyeful instead. He continued to stare and his jaw dropped a bit.

He was still staring into space after she had straightened herself and walked back into the kitchen.

"So how long have you been crushing on Margret?" Alex asked nonchalantly.

"Like, forever." Mordecai answered back in a dreamy tone, before the laughing of Mani, Alex and Rigby brought him back to earth. "Wait, what? Shut up!" He cried with a blush.

"Pfft, what a loser!" Mani smirked crossing her arms. Mordecai grimaced from the small girl's words; he adjusted himself in his seat.

"You don't even know me…" He grumbled, crossing his arms now. Mani simply snickered as her eyes turned to look at the blue haired male once more.

"How old are you again Mordecai? Twenty-seven?" She asked quickly. He narrowed his gaze.

"I'm twenty-three, Mani..." He repeated.

"Aren't you a little old to be crushing on people, shouldn't you be worrying about getting back to the retirement home before lights out?" She started to giggle. Rigby squealed as he jumped out of his seat towards Mani.

"Hey shut up, we're not old!" He shouted. Mani didn't flinch though, she placed one of her legs over the other and turned to look at the shorter male.

"Wah wah wah, wah wah wah!" She grumbled in the rhythm of his statement, attempting to mock Rigby's voice. Alex giggled and got up as well, she stood beside Mani still snickering.

"You guys are sick; you get some type of lady boner whenever you insult us." Mordecai started angrily. "It's obvious that Mani was never hugged as a child." He growled as he pointed at her. She simply giggled.

"You really should be nicer to me Mordecai, or I might slip and mess up. Maybe say something that'll make Margret never ever want to date you… ever." She said quietly and slowly in her usual monotone. They two stared hard at each other for a few seconds, and then Mordecai finally scowled.

"Evil has a face." He muttered. Mani started to snicker as she brought her mouth to Alex's ear and started to whisper to her. Almost on cue Margret came back into room.

"Hey guys, what'd I miss?"

"Oh Mordecai was just telling me about how much he hates whatever your favorite band is Margret."

"He does?" The red head's face turned sad as she glanced over to him.

"Oh come on! You're not even trying anymore!" He shouted in outrage. The room fell silent and Mani rolled her eyes at the others.

"L-O-L, J-K…" She started listlessly and slouched in her seat. A sigh of relief cause of Margret's side of the room, did she seriously believe anything that came out of Mani's malicious mouth? Rigby was tapping his foot irritably as he looked over to Mordecai.

"So uh, the others should be on their way soon…Wanna help me put out some snacks?" Margret suggested.

"That's a great idea Margret!" Mordecai replied quickly. Mani and Alex appeared to be holding back laughter, followed by Alex quietly mocking Mordecai in the similar fashion to what Mani had done to Rigby earlier.

"Yeah well, me and Mordecai have to talk… In the bathroom… About stuff… Guy stuff…" Rigby continued. The ladies simply stared at him wide eyed. Mani raised a brow as she stifled a giggled.

"Yeah everybody-guy stuff." She sarcastically, gesturing with her fingers.

"STOP TALKING!" Rigby shouted then immediately looked to Mordecai, signaling him to follow the other male out of the room. Actually going nowhere near the bathroom, the blue haired male glanced around awkwardly.

"Why are you just letting these two skirts try and ruin our lives? We need to fight back!" He scowled. Rigby motioned to punch one of the walls, failing he scowled once more rubbing his fist.

"I don't want to waste my time with this! I Febreezed myself FOR THIS?!" Mordecai rolled his eyes as he leant over so that he and Rigby were at the same level.

"Okay first of all, I Febreezed you. Second- calm down dude, I'm so close to hooking up with Margret." He whispered angrily. Rigby still had an expression of extreme displeasure.

"No! No you're not! Stop lying to yourself! Stop lying to me, stop feeding me your lies! I'm not some fuckin' lie machine that you only pay in lies in order to get some lie soda! I want to go home!"

"Rigby stop acting like a baby!"

"We need to do something about them! Kick their asses or something, I don't know!"

"You want to beat up girls? How would that even change anything?" Mordecai pulled the shorter male by his collar and stared intently at him. The two stayed silent for a moment.

"Well I don't see you coming up with any ideas!" He answered finally. Mordecai let go of Rigby, tossing him to the ground before heading back in the living room.

"I'm not holding back on them anymore Mordecai!" Rigby yelled as he watched him leave the room. Mordecai lifted one hand as he rolled his eyes.

"Don't do anything stupid, or I'll never forgive you." He said finally before getting back to the group. Rigby stood there by himself, his arms crossed. "Maybe… I don't know. We'll see."

"I refuse to have my life stolen." He grumbled.

* * *

Finally the others began to arrive and the party had officially begun, Mordecai was sticking to Margret like an old band aid on a hairy leg. Pretending to be interested in the other people at the party but really getting an eyeful of the coke-bottle shaped redhead, she was somehow oblivious to it. Rigby had been angrily sitting on the couch, once in a while a person would come and speak to him but he'd quickly dismiss them.

"Hey, you look lonely over here." A blonde haired girl said as she sat beside him. He crossed his arms angrily and stared ahead.

"You're kind of cute in a short Mexican looking way…" She slurred.

"I'm not Mexican! And I'm not short, I'm average height! AVERAGE!" He began to rant but the girl did not seem perturbed.

"Yeah I know but like, you're cute like in a raccoon kind of way." She added. His eyes widened as he slowly turned his head to look at her.

"Why do people keep saying I remind them of a raccoon! I only ate food out of the garbage once. It was just one time, nobody ever remembers anything cool I do. It's always that time I ate food out of the garbage. What about that one time I played that one game I almost won! Huh? HUH!" The girl stared blankly at Rigby and scooted closer to him and smirked.

"I think I wanna give you a hand job."

"You smell like herpes…" He grumbled.

Margret finally took a seat in the kitchen as the mass of humans finally stopped chatting with her- mostly because Mordecai would stand there awkwardly during their conversations. She exhaled as she took and ice cube from the freezer and rubbed it against her neck, Mordecai stared hard.

"Ah, all these people are making my apartment so hot." She sighed. Mordecai simply gulped.

"Uh huh…"

"Why aren't you hanging out with Rigby, or Mani and Alex?" She asked as she leant on the counter, almost posing.

"Oh, I don't get to hang with you enough Margret." He said quickly, shaking off his gaze. She shrugged as she got another ice cube and started to lick and suck on it gently.

"I really should hang out with you more often." Mordecai added, wide eyed. Suddenly almost as if she had teleported to where the two were standing- Mani had appeared, causing the two to jump up from the surprise. She groaned as she grabbed a soda and took a seat on the counter.

"Sup fags and fag-ettes." She grumbled as she took a sip from her drink. Mordecai narrowed his gaze at her. "Cock blocker…" He muttered inaudibly. She kicked her feet in Mordecai's direction.

"See what I did there? Like it sounds like the actual words but I also make it sound like I'm referring women and men… are you witty enough to appreciate my cleverness?" She added quickly. Margret started to giggle when she realized the joke. Mordecai rolled his eyes. Mani finally hopped off the counter, stepping pass the tall male.

"Yeah well I'm witty too. Check this out… You ever wonder- How come you can tune a piano but you can't TUNA FISH?" Mordecai said finally, he glanced between the two of them chuckling but they didn't seem to appreciate the joke. Margret gave a sympathetic laugh as Mani glared at him.

"Awesome story guy." She muttered as she walked away. Mordecai lowered his head, that joke was pretty lame actually. He sighed hard but looked up when he felt Margret's hand on his shoulder, his lips curled into a smile as he leant forward towards the redhead's face, he slowly began to close his eyes-

"Oh look there's my friend Stephen!" She said excitedly. This broke Mordecai out of his trance as he turned to see a tall blonde haired, tatted guy across the room wearing a band t- shirt and skinny jeans much like Mordecai's. He grimaced.

"Oh I hope he sees me, I'm kinda hoping me and him hook up by the end of the night." She added, the record skipped in Mordecai's mind as he quickly turned back to look at Margret, wide eyed. She was too busy trying to get the blonde guy's attention.

"Crap, Mani got to him before I could. Oh well I'll wait until later." She shrugged. Margret turned to look at Mordecai again and smiled. "You and Mani would be so cute together, you know because you're tall and she's short. You should talk to her, same with Rigby and Alex."

"Mani definitely hates my guts." He sighed, obviously uncomfortable by the conversation.

"Really? No she doesn't, she tries to come off as distant and nonchalant at first but once you get close to her she's a really good friend." Margret leaned closer to his ear for a moment. "She thinks you're gay, isn't she silly?" She giggled. "She told me about how she came into you and Rigby's room this morning to wake up and you guys were like- spooning but I know sometimes he gets scared at night. I set her straight." Mordecai stared wide eyed as Margret spoke, the rage building up inside of him. He masked it with a smile.

"I'll be right back." He sighed as he moved through the crowd towards Stephen and Mani. He smiled as he stood beside the short girl.

"Hey Mani, sorry to interrupt whatever this is." He started, pointing between Mani and Stephen. She raised a brow as he spoke. "So I was wondering Mani, can I give you those used tampons you had me hold for you. I kinda need the room in my pockets right now." Her eyes widened as she glanced over at Stephen who simply chuckled and walked away from her.

"You ass, do you have any idea how hard it is for me to actually go up to people and talk to them?" She asked in an angrily whisper. Mordecai started to chuckle as he looked downward at her. "That was for telling Margret I was gay." He replied. She squinted her eyes at him and swiftly stepped on the toe of his sneaker; he scowled in pain then attempted to mask his pain. As he exhaled he swiftly punched her left breast. Mani squealed for a moment then groaned.

"My tit…" She said in a hoarse voice. The two tried to breathe the pain away. "I will fucking destroy you." Mordecai whispered, he looked up noticing that Margret was watching their conversation.

"Smile." He said quickly.

"What?"

"Fucking smile before I punch you in the vagina…" He repeated- a grin spread across his face. She raised a brow then she started to smirk as well. "If we smile, she'll think our conversation is going well no matter what we're really saying to each other." He added.

"Screw you, and screw every comic book you've ever liked ever." Mani chimed.

"Haha, when we get back to the house- when you least expect it I'm going to burn every Avengers shirt you own." He chuckled in return.

"Ha, I fucking hate you." She sung quietly through her grin as she and Mordecai turned to wave at Margret.

* * *

"Ow, ow, ow, ow. Why are you doing this again? Ow, ow, ow." Rigby groans could be heard from outside the bathroom.

"Wow! You're a whole lot bigger than I expected!" The girl shouted.

"Oh, that's unsettling."

Alex wandered by the bathroom. She leant on the door and listened, hearing Rigby's voice. She chuckled, picking up an empty red solo cup sitting on end table. She jogged to the kitchen and searched the cabinets finally emerging with cinnamon. She poured it all into the cup, then went back towards the bathroom. Rigby and an obviously intoxicated girl emerged; the brunette was limping as he groaned.

"Are guys supposed to like that!?" He whined as he held himself, he looked up quickly as he noticed Alex. "What do you want!? I'm on to you! You sent her didn't you?" He shouted.

"Who- Huh, what? No, I feel bad about calling you stupid. So I figured I'd give you an apology coke." She said perkily extending the cup in his direction. He grasped it and glared at her raising a brow. He brought the cup to his lips for a moment then paused.

"Wait… this isn't poison is it?" He asked in suspicion. Alex quickly shook her head. He glared at her a little while longer then brought the cup to his mouth again but then paused once more.

"…This is pee isn't it?" Alex shook her head again and Rigby finally shrugged as he started to swallow what was in the cup. His stomach dropped and he began to wheeze as he started flail around.

"You bit-" He coughed hard looking at Alex who was now laughing. He hopped up and down as he tried pushing through the crowd to the kitchen. "WATER" he tried to shout but he could hardly speak. He choked as he started to climb on Margret's furniture in a panic, knocking several things over and breaking a lamp. The whole party had stopped to watch him.

"Oh my gosh! Rigby why!?" She shouted as he shoved through a few people. Stephen smirked, he'd been standing beside her. He crossed his arms as he watch Rigby jump on the coffee table to the living room couch into some girl's lap.

"Dude, he moves like a spider monkey." He chuckled; the music that had been playing had stopped. Mordecai looked on in embarrassment, Mani snuck away to Alex's side as she watched as well. He finally reached the kitchen, jumping on the counter. He threw many of Margret's plates and glass cups around then decided to turn on the faucet and drink straight from it. He attached his mouth to it as his cheeks widened, filling up with cold water. The crowd parted so Margret could get into the kitchen.

"Rigby, what's wrong with you?" She asked loudly. The male detached his mouth and turned to Margret, he felt another coughing fit coming. He spat all of the water in his mouth out. Unfortunately it all landed on Margret. The crowd gasped and Mani and Alex subtly high fived.

"Gross…" The redhead gagged.

"Very nice work, your pranks are almost like exquisite art." She whispered leaning towards Alex then went back to watching. Mordecai quickly ran over to Margret and Rigby.

"Oh crap Margret, I'm so sorry about this." He started to say but Margret was heaving and before he knew it she threw up on his feet.

"Well that's fantastic." He whispered as his face went pale. Mani and Alex were still in the corner giggling.

"These are the moments that make life worth living." Alex whispered in a giggle fit. Mani nodded in agreement. "You know what should do-" Mani started to mutter.

"Okay!" Stephen finally got up on the coffee table, drawing he crowd's attention and cutting Mani's suggestion short.

"Alright guys, it's time for everybody to leave sorry!" He yelled, jumping down, he shoved passed Mordecai and straight to Margret taking her away from the scene as her apartment started to empty.

"I'm sorry Mordecai, I was just so grossed out." She gagged again as she was pulled away. Mordecai looked on empathetically then his gazed was focused on Mani and Alex. He glared at them and crossed his arms; Rigby finally limped over to him.

"What the hell Rigby!?"

"It wasn't me! Alex gave me a cup full of cinnamon." He coughed. Mordecai grumbled as he looked over to the two girls again. The blue haired male started to shake his head as he stared at them.

"This means war." He whispered. Immediately after Mordecai's words, Rigby leant over and vomited on the taller male's feet as well. Mordecai instantly exhaled hard, hearing laughter from the left over guests in the apartment.

* * *

**Co-Authored with Mani De Malice! **


	4. Chapter 4

**Another day, another Chapter :D**

* * *

They four sat at the kitchen table. Exchanging awkward looks periodically, Mordecai munched on his cereal as he glanced at Mani for a moment then looked away quickly, turning his attention to the rain splattered window.

"I guess we'll be working inside today cause of the rain." He muttered. The other three said nothing. Just as soon as the shorter girl had finished her own cereal she gently pushed the bowl away and daintily folded her hands on the table, her eyes focused on Mordecai. In return his own eyes darted around awkwardly once more; the girl still had not spoken. Alex didn't speak either, probably because they all had just woke up.

"So, do you guys have sex with each other?" Mani asked casually. Mordecai had been in mid chew and spewed his milk and cereal from the statement. Rigby looked up quickly; a grimace came across his visage. Mani's lips slowly curled into a smirk as Alex stared at her friend wide eyed. The blue haired man sat up in his seat.

"Excuse me?" He asked, leaning forward and squinting his eyes.

"You guys are always together… You're porking right?" She stifled a laugh. Alex shook her head and held in a laugh as well.

"You two are always together, are you having sex?" He asked quickly.

"Oh no no no, it's different with us. We're sisters and girls."

Mordecai started to squint his eyes again, Rigby's expression was less than pleased. Alex lifted her head, the two girls exchanged smug looks awaiting the male's next moves.

"I CAN'T TAKE THESE BROADS ANYMORE!"

Their silence was finally broken when he angrily tried to flip over the table. Failing miserably, he stormed out of the room. Mani jumped back a little bit in her seat and giggled as Rigby exited. Mordecai stood as well.

"I know what you're trying to do. You're trying to make me mad and trash the kitchen so I'll get fired. Well Mani, you're a sociopath…" He said lowly. The short girl shook her head and leant on the table, giving a look of complacency.

"You don't even know what a sociopath is Mordecai." She answered quickly. He stared down at her angrily for the moment. He simply grunted as he stood up straight and he glared at her.

"Batman sucks." Mani said smirking. Mordecai's face flushed pink as he roared loudly and finally flipped over the kitchen table. Mani had fell backward from the impact, Alex had moved out of the way in time.

"Mordecai, what's wrong with you!" Alex yelled, but he said nothing he simply stared wide eyed at the newly made mess.

"A bloo, bloo, bloo." Mani whimpered on the floor, just in time for Benson to come inside. His face was red too.

"Mordecai! What the hell! Clean this up! Who just tosses tables like that's okay, now look at what you've done." Benson shouted, he continued to rage as he made his way to the living room. Mordecai still standing there dumbfounded by his actions, he glanced down at Mani and ran to help her off the floor but she quickly got up on her own before he could even touch her. She placed her hood over her blonde and black locks, smirking. She walked backwards out of the room pulling Alex along with her.

"You know, if you walk backwards like that, you'll hurt yourself." Alex told her.

"Shut up!" She told the other girl before letting out a grunt of pain. "I did that on purpose! Now where was I? ...Oh yeah! Maniacal laugh… Maniacal laugh… Maniacal laugh." Her words getting louder as she exited the kitchen, Mordecai groaned angrily as he watched her leave.

"We have to do something about those two."

* * *

"Hey Muscle Man!" Mordecai called as he stood outside of the large man's trailer. Both he and Rigby had talked it over and they decided that if they were gonna pull one over o the girls, then they'd have to get some outside help. They would go to Muscle man one at a time and ask for help pranking the other, but they'd really be pranking the girls. "Common man, it's pouring out here. Answer the door!"

"What do you want loser?!" Muscle Man shouted as he threw the door open.

"Dude, I need help pranking Ma-Rigby." He said, catching himself at the last minute.

"You want to prank Rigby?" He asked as he squinted at the tall blue haired man.

"Yeah, totally."

"Why?"

"What?" He blinked as he looked at the rotund man in front of him.

"Why do you wanna prank that other loser?"

"Uh, well..." Mordecai thought for a second before blurting out, "He embarrassed me at a party."

"Hmm...well I guess that warrant's a revenge prank. Alright here's what you do..."

* * *

"You're sure this will work?" Rigby asked as they quietly walked up the stairs.

"Dude, the idea came from Muscle Man. It has to be legit. All we have to do is take Alex's clothes and then scare the shit outta Mani." Mordecai whispered as they walked closer to their room.

"Wait how are we suppose to scare her?"

"I dunno, but when I told him I wanted to scare you, he said use ghosts, so I am."

"Hey, I'm not scared of ghost!" He said a little loudly. Mordecai punched him and he groaned in pain. "Dude!"

"Don't dude me, you have to shut up!" he hissed. They both froze when they heard the shower go off, but relaxed when they heard a hairdryer start up. "C'mon, hurry up!" They raced into the room and looked around. The room was about the same size as theirs, and had a closet and a big dresser in a corner. There were two single beds against either wall and band posters already adorned the walls. Both beds had laptops on them and both were messy. Rigby went over to the dresser and Mordecai went to the closet.

"How do we know which clothes are what's her face's?" Rigby asked as he opened the drawer in the middle. He grimaced when he saw it was only underwear.

"Um...I think she likes purple." Mordecai spoke as he started to grab anything that looked purple.

"Man, girls are so weird." He said as he grabbed all the underwear in the drawer. "Why would they even need this many clothes and junk? And what is this thing use for anyway? A hat?" He asked as he held up a lacy purple and white bra.

"Wha-? Dude! That's a bra you idiot!" Mordecai cried as he turned back to the closet, his cheeks a light pink. "It's for her boobs, duh."

"Whatever man, it looks useless." He said as he looked at it. He shrugged and placed it on his head before looking threw the other drawers.

"Man, why do chicks have so many clothes?" He complained grabbing everything that was hanging up on the bar. "Okay, I think I got all her stuff." He said as he turned back around and looked at Rigby. He sighed and shook his head as he went to walk out of the room. "C'mon, before one of them comes back." They ran out of the room and ran all the way downstairs not stopping until they got out the door and got outside. "Let's dump these in the fountain."

"Sweet." Rigby said as they ran there. They dumped them all in the fountain before rushing back to the house. "Okay now what?"

"Now we have to-," He looked at his small friend and groaned, smacking his forehead with his hand. "Rigby, why do you still have her bra on your head?"

"What?" He reached up and felt the bra. "Oh yeah. Guess I forgot about it." He said with a shrug. "No big deal."

"Yes, it's a big deal! They'll know that we were in their room and everything! Get rid of it while I set up the projector."

Rigby scoffed and snatched the bra off his head and balled it up and stuffed it into his pocket. He looked at Mordecai who was on a chair fiddling with a projector hanging form the ceiling. "How'd you get that up there?"

"Muscle Man helped earlier when you were sleeping." He explained as he put a disk in it. He went and shut the lights off and took a remote out of his pocket, pressed a button to turn the projector on. Rigby jumped as pained moaning started to play from somewhere, and when he looked at Mordecai to ask what was going on, he screamed when he saw the ghostly image of and old man.

Mordecai switched it off with a laugh and held his stomach as he doubled over. "This is great. Now we just have to sit back and-" He was cut off by a scream of rage.

"MY CLOTHES!"

They both snickered when they heard Alex's yell. "That'll teach that bitch not to mess with us." Rigby said as he started laughing harder.

"Yeah, now we just have to wait for Mani to show up and we can-."

"You can what?"

They both jumped with a shout and turned around to see Mani standing there. "You! How long have you been standing there?" Mordecai yelled.

She raised a brow at their display before saying, "Like a minute. I just came from the basement and junk."

"What were you doing in the basement?"

"And where are your pants?" Rigby asked looking at her legs. Mordecai looked at them too and realized that she only had on one of her Captain America shirts and a pair of black panties with matching socks.

She scoffed. "Pants are for the weak of heart. If I'm not going outside for anything, I'm not wearing pants. Now what we're you old geezers doing in here?"

"Quit calling us old!" Rigby yelled.

"Yeah, besides it's the living room, so everyone's allowed in here."

"Whatever, old losers."

"MANI!" They heard Alex scream from the stairs landing. "PLEASE PLEASE _PLEASE_ TELL ME YOU DECIDED TO DO LAUNDRY FOR ONCE AND FORGOT TO TELL ME!"

"What? Why would I do laundry when you do it so well?" She yelled back as she walked over to the stairs. She blinked then raised a brow. "Where are your clothes?"

"Does it look like I have a fucking clue where my clothes are?!" She screeched. Mani sighed and walked up the stairs. They heard them talking quietly before they heard the sound of footsteps coming down the stairs.

"Alex, chillax. Pants are over rated anyway. Who needs them? Not us!"

"No, I need them Mani. Like, I seriously need some pants."

"Pfft. No you don't." She replied as they reached the living room. "Oh yeah, Ass-Face and Midget are in here too, or whatever."

She whipped her head around and they saw she was only in a black shirt with some Japanese cartoon on it that stopped at her hips and her black panties were in full view. Her face lit up like a candle as she tried to run back up to her room but the hand around her wrist stopped her.

"Dude, c'mon and join me in my rebellion against pants. It's totally fine and all. This is our place too ya know. We don't always have to be dressed or anything." Mani explained as she dragged her reluctant blushing friend over to the stereo, turning it on and flipping through the stations. "All we need is some tunes to get this party started."

"Please let me die. Please let me die. Please let me die." Alex muttered over and over.

"Quit being a baby, baby." Mani told her as she finally settled on a station. "Aw yes! I love this song." She started to dance.

"What do we do now?" Rigby whispered as he watched Mani dance.

"I dunno. The plan's not going how I expected..." He whispered back as Mani finally got Alex to start dancing with her. "At all." He added with a sigh.

"Hey, what's all this racket?" Benson said loudly as he came through the back door. "What's going on here?!" He shouted as he walked into the living room. "Mordecai Rigby what's go-!" He stopped as he saw the two girls dancing and swallowed, his mouth going dry all of a sudden. "I thought," He cleared his throat. "I thought things like this only happen in porn." He muttered as he stood there.

"Oh my, is that music I hear?" The guys turned their heads as Pops came down the stairs. "Oh a dance party! How delightful! May I join in?"

"Sure old dude, go ahead." Mani said over the music. "One rule: NO PANTS!" She screamed before doing the bump with Alex.

"Oh goody!" Pops said as he took off his pants. Benson stared at the three with his eyes and mouth opened wide. Soon Mordecai and Rigby would stand in awe as well.

"This is stupid…" Rigby groaned as he shook his head and began to walk away, going up the stairs. Just at that moment Muscle Man busted into the door, shoving Rigby before joining the rest of the group.

"Hey losers, how'd the pra-" His words cut off from what he'd saw. Rigby groaned on the floor and dragged himself back to the group, he tried prying Mordecai from his zombie like gaze.

"Oh my gosh, there are half naked women on the internet. These broads aren't special!" He whined as he kicked at Mordecai's legs then tried knocking him over, his efforts were weak and useless. Rigby began to weakly punch at Mordecai, at this point the blue haired male had enough of Rigby's attempts. Mordecai quickly punched Rigby in the chest causing the smaller male to topple over and roll away from the group.

"I hate you guys." He groaned. The girls and Pops continued to dance. Mani hopped up and down from the sound of the next song.

"Those weird old guys are staring at us Alex." She grumbled as she started to mosh wildly. Alex ceased her dancing for a moment and looked over to the group.

"Is this the part where the pizza man comes in?" Benson asked in a daze.

"No, this is the part where they start making out." Muscle Man yelled angrily. Mani ceased her moshing and skipped over to Pops and Alex.

"Guys, we gotta do a wall of death!" She shouted over the music.

"Oh how delightful! What's the wall of death?"

"It's a dance…move where two crowds of people run at each other until they hit somebody. We gotta do it." Mani answered as she hopped up and down. Pops glanced over to Alex grinning, but she was less than pleased.

"We can't do a wall of death, there's only three of us and three of them." Alex rolled her eyes.

"Yes we can! Let's just try. We have to make them stop looking at us." Mani pleaded, she started to jump up and down again, preparing herself for impact. "You ready Pops?" He raised a brow as he started repeating Mani's movements. She snickered as she watched him.

"Yeah good, get nice and warmed up. You too Alex, get warmed up!" She glared at the other girl. Mani had waited until the guitars in the song had gotten ready.

"One…Two…Three!" She yelled as the three ran for the others. Mani aiming for Mordecai, Pops running at Benson and finally Alex lunged at Muscle Man. Benson went down like a bag of rocks. The other two however barely budged. Alex sort of gave up and saw fit to try and sneak away from the scene. Mani continued to try and knock down Mordecai but failed.

"We're not even over there anymore! What are you looking at?" She screamed, ramming herself into him one more time and causing him to stagger. Mani felt herself falling backward; she grasped Mordecai's hoodie causing him to go down with her.

"Dude!" Mordecai yelled.

"Every time I fall down I try to bring somebody down with me." She groaned as she squirmed under him.

"Why am I not surprised?!" He exclaimed trying to get up from the floor. Benson sat up from his fall looking up at Pops with a raised brow.

"What the?" He started.

"Good show Benson! I do believe you were supposed to run at me as well." Pops giggled. Benson quickly got up, brushing himself off. He looked around at the scene like a boss again, and he was obviously displeased.

"Are you guys serious?! Muscle Man turn off that stereo, Mordecai stop… WHATEVER THAT IS YOU'RE DOING WITH MANI!" He yelled as he pointed at them. "Rigby, get off the damn floor too. You three, put some pants on. This isn't some frat house, get back to work!" Benson shouted. Mordecai quickly got up from the floor leaving Mani behind.

"…What work?" She whispered as she looked up innocently at Benson. But, her words did not get the desired effect.

"ARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHH" Benson started to roar, causing the girl scoot away in fear. He stomped to the radio and turned it off then pulled up Pops from the floor and began to go up the stairs. He was consistent with the roar he had started with, and it could be heard throughout the house.

"Good job Mani, you broke Benson." Mordecai grumbled as he pulled Rigby off the floor. Rigby slapped the blue haired male away as he dusted himself off.

"Yeah well, you broke my eyes with your ugly face." She said quickly. Muscle Man let out a hearty laugh as he went to give Mani a high five.

"Oh, that was a good one. How'd you even come up with that? It was awesome!" He continued to laugh. Mordecai glared at Mitch for a moment then turned his attention to Mani again.

"You heard Benson put on some pants, and you can't break eyes."

"I was just about to put some on and you can! From looking at you for more than five minutes!" Muscle Man started to laugh; Mordecai rolled his eyes as he exited the room. Rigby hissed as he pointed at Mani who still hadn't gotten up from the floor.

"Yeah that's right, walk away." She whispered as she twisted her neck and snapped her fingers.

* * *

"Oh man, this is gonna be awesome. I feel like I'm in Inception." Rigby whispered as he scattered around turning off all the lights in the living room. Mordecai narrowed his eyes at the shorter male until he came back to his side.

"Ugh! I mean like, having a really cool plan. Not the dream within a dream thing." Rigby scowled.

"You probably should've mentioned that before."

"Why? You knew what I meant."

"No I didn't. Usually when people talk about Inception they're talking about the dream within and dream part."

"That wasn't the only part of the movie you know!" The brunette yelled.

"What do you mean? That's what the whole movie was about!" Mordecai punched Rigby in the shoulder hard, the two's eyes glanced upward in the darkness when the heard shuffling from upstairs.

"Who the hell turned off all the lights downstairs?" Mani shouted from above. Mordecai and Rigby glanced at each other for a moment then quickly started to shuffle around the room, finally the two decided to hide behind the couch. Mani slowly walked down the stairs and she was actually wearing pants again, she glanced around.

"Hello?" She called out, Rigby couldn't help but snicker but his giggling was interrupted by Mordecai's elbow colliding with his stomach. Mani finally shrugged as she walked through the living room into the kitchen. The two males jogged after her and peeked into the kitchen from behind a wall.

Mani opened up the fridge and tapped her index finger on her chin as she looked at the contents. Rigby tilted his head and looked up at Mordecai.

"The hell is she even doing?" He whispered.

"Shh!" Mordecai shoved Rigby hard then turned his attention back to the short girl. She leant into the fridge and pulled out a few bottles of soda and examined them meticulously. The two male exchanged looks as she did this. She finally sighed and put the bottles back in the fridge and pulled out three new ones. She smirked as she pulled the cap off one and drank the whole thing until there was about one sip left, then she proceeded to lick and suck on the openings of the bottles before placing the caps back on and throwing them back in the fridge. Mordecai gagged.

"Isn't that your soda?" Rigby whispered. Mordecai's eyes widened as he quietly scowled. The two jumped when they saw Mani look up for a moment.

"Hello?" She called out again, darting her eyes. Mordecai signaled Rigby to follow him into the living room. The two tried their best to fit under the coffee table but Mordecai's size was problematic.

"Ugh! Scoot over!" Rigby whined.

"I can't scoot over you ass! I'm six feet tall."

"Then cut off your legs!"

"Oh yeah, let me just run into the kitchen and grab a knife and cut off my legs Rigby. I won't go into shock or anything, people willingly cut off their legs all the time. It's a common phenomenon."

"I know, so go do it!" Rigby whispered angrily. Mordecai glared at the brunette and fiercely kneed his side. Rigby coiled in pain, giving Mordecai more room.

"Cut that out, asshole." He muttered. Mani finally walked into the living room and glanced around, almost in a panic.

"Hello?" She said a little louder. Mordecai nodded as he pulled out a small remote.

"Cue scary sounds." He pressed one of the buttons as the room started to fill with creepy whispers. Mani's eyes widened, it seemed she was almost frozen in the spot. Rigby started to quietly snicker again. Mordecai pressed another button turning on the projector. Mani whimpered as she stepped back as she continued to look around.

"Is anybody there?" She whispered, she turned her head to see the ghostly projection moving slowly across the room. She began to pant as tears began to pool up in her eyes, finally a terrified shriek escaped her lips as started to sniffle and sob. Mani quickly ran up the stairs wildly in fear, even to the point that she slipped and slid down a few steps. When she finally got back on her feet she sped up the stairs and into her and Alex's room. Slamming the door hard, her sobbing was more than audible. Mordecai and Rigby emerged from under the table turning all the lights back on and laughing hysterically.

"Yeah that's right! Go cry Mani!" Rigby giggled. The two exchanged high fives.

"That's why you don't mess with Mordecai with Rigby, No no! You never mess with Mordecai and Rigby! Cause you'll be running and crying like a big baby! Wah Wah Wah Wah- LIKE A BIG BABY!" The two started to sing in unison then gave each other high fives once more. Rigby finally began to head upstairs still having a hearty laugh, Mordecai followed behind.

"Dude, we're so awesome." The brunette chimed.

"Yeah totally." Mordecai nodded his head as the two went towards their bedroom. The blue haired male stopped when he heard the sound of Mani sniffling from her room.

"Mordecai, where are you going?" Rigby whined from their doorway. Mordecai shook his head as he headed towards the girl's door.

"Don't worry, I'm just gonna go rub our prank in her face." Mordecai chuckled, in return Rigby shrugged as he went into their room. Mordecai tip toed to the door and opened it gently. All he could see was Mani sitting on her bed crying.

"Get out of here Grandpa! I don't want to hear any stories about the war." She sniffled. Mordecai rolled his eyes as he moved closer to her.

"That's funny because, you talk a lot of shit for somebody who just got super-duper awesome pranked! OOOOOOOHHHHHHH!" He gloated. The girl looked up at him, wiping her eyes.

"What?" She whispered.

"There's no ghosts here big baby, me and Rigby just pranked yo ass!" He laughed as he waved his hands around in her face.

"Get out of my room." She sniffled. Mordecai stopped his gloating and stared hard at her.

"What, but you guys have been screwing with us this whole time. What? You did expect any retaliation?" He shouted.

"I don't know people just usually let me abuse them, either they think I'm joking or they just try to avoid me." She muttered. Mordecai narrowed his eyes at her for a moment. Mani quickly got up from her bed and started moving around her room.

"I told you to get out, so fucking leave already."

"What's your problem? I never did anything to you, so why are you being such a douchebag?"

"There is no problem except I don't want you in my room so get out!"

"Seriously what did I do to you?"

"You don't like the Avengers!"

"Is that seriously what it is? Because I'm a grown man and you're a grown woman and we should be having tiffs because I insulted one of your favorite comic books."

"Shut up, you work at a park!"

"So do you!"

"Yeah, but I JUST started!"

"Listen, opinions are like assholes everybody has one. Why are you even upset?"

"Because! I'm afraid of ghosts you idiot." She sniffled as she turned away.

"See, I didn't know that. Maybe if you actually got to know people instead of being a douche!" Mani stayed silent as Mordecai glared at the short girl.

"Maybe if you weren't such a tall jackass who liked DC I would consider it."

"There's nothing wrong with DC, why do all Marvel fans think it's cool to bash us?"

"Maybe if you didn't suck ass!"

"Maybe if you didn't suck dick!" Mordecai said loudly but simultaneously awkward. Mani scowled as she looked up at the blue haired male in harsh judgment. She shook her head. "Oh god. You're disgusting, get out my room." Mani rolled her eyes finally walking away from him and going towards the other side of the room. Mordecai angrily followed behind her.

"What the fuck are you following me for you tool?" She grumbled. He continued to glare at her

"The game." He muttered angrily as he moved closer. Mani turned around to face him, she raised a brow.

"What?" She growled. Mordecai was now hovering over her.

"You just lost the game..." He spoke again. Mani and Mordecai stared hard at each other for a moment before lunging at each other, their mouths meeting in a sloppy fervent kiss. He pushed the small girl against the wall and continued to collide his mouth with hers, deepening with every kiss.

* * *

"Rigby, I'm so hungry and I can't find Mani or the tall one! Do you have the number to that one pizza place with the pizza?" Alex whined as she dragged herself down the hallway. Rigby's hand had been halfway down the hallway trash bin, he quickly retracted when he saw the pale girl coming his way. He snickered from the sight of her. She still wasn't wearing any pants.

"Nice underwear." He laughed as he pointed.

"At least I wear underwear… You Philistine." She grumbled.

"Okay first off, my name isn't Phil. It's Rigby and I don't give people numbers to my favorite grilled cheese place." He shouted. "Oh and I do wear underwear! Most of the time." Alex shook her head as she crossed her arms.

"I said PIZZA."

"Ugh whatever, I don't care about anything you say so I barely even listen." He groaned.

"Can I just get the number for the fucking pizza place you ass?"

"Pizza? Oh wait, I think I have the number in my pocket or whatever." Rigby began to pat himself down, he looked back to Alex and narrowed his eyes. "But I'm not giving you it." Alex quickly grasped the male's collar and began to shake him.

"Give me the number you imbecile!" She yelled before slapping him hard. Rigby shoved the girl away and made a karate stance as he glared at her. He then began to empty his pockets, dropping the contents on the floor. The items in Rigby's pockets seem to include everything but money. The male finally pulled out a small paper with a number on it then looked to Alex whose face was pink with rage.

"What?" He grumbled then looked downward seeing her bra on the floor. "Uh-oh." He looked back up and cursed under his breath as he turned to run away. She grabbed his collar before he could get anywhere.

"What did you do with my clothes you pervert!?" She yelled as she grabbed his arm and placed it behind his back, pinning him to the wall. Rigby squirmed and whimpered in his grasp.

"I was just pranking you, no need to go super crazy over a good zinger homie." Rigby called out, he was speeding towards the fountain with all of Alex's clothes in it, she wasn't far behind and she was livid. Rigby and Alex finally reached the fountain and exchanged glances.

"Listen it's better to just admit that me and Mordecai totally got you." He continued to speak. Alex crossed her arms as she stared at her clothing floating around in the water.

"Get my clothes out of there…" She said grimly.

"What? No! Why should I do it? It's your clothes." Rigby yelled. Alex grasped his shoulders and pushed him forward, closer to the fountain.

"Do it now!" She yelled. Rigby groaned loudly as he leant over, fishing out some of Alex's garments. In that instant she quickly shoved the male into the fountain then proceeded to hold his head down in the water. Rigby thrashed around wildly as she did this, he brought his head up. He inhaled desperately before she pushed his head back into the water. Rigby's free hands grasped at Alex, pulling her into the fountain with him. She gasped as she raised her head up from the liquid, getting back on her feet.

"You just tried to kill me!"

"You deserved it!" She yelled splashing him violently causing him to fall backward. He crawled forward in the water and pulled her down again as the two began to scrap.

"You're an ass! That's why you wear glasses! And that's why nobody likes you!" He yelled.

"Nobody likes me? You consistently reek of armpits and dirty socks!"

"Yeah well, YOU'RE PALE."

"Oh yeah, stating the obvious. You must feel so proud of yourself!"

"WELL WHEN I SIT ON THE COUCH I DON'T SLOUCH LIKE A JACKASS!"

"OH YEAH? WELL AT LEAST I ACTUALLY SLEEP IN A BED AND NOT A TRAMPOLINE!" Alex shouted, tackling him. Rigby miraculously turned the girl over on her back and sat on top of her.

"I've got you now! I'm not gonna let you steal my life!" He shouted. Alex raised a brow as she looked up at him.

"What are you even talking about?" She groaned as she wiggled underneath him. Rigby stared down at the girl, just noticing that she completely soaking wet and still not wearing any pants. He narrowed his eyes as he leant downward.

"You think you can trick me with your… wet boobs and… wet panties and your lies and-" He trailed off into staring. Alex rolled her eyes as she pulled off her glasses; they were all foggy and wet. Alex looked up at Rigby raising a brow. "I'm probably better at video games…" He growled. The girl grasped his head and pulled his face to hers. The two kissed as the water dampened them even more. The two broke the kiss to breath and stared at each other.

"You'll _never_ be better at video games than me." Alex said through a grimace. "And I hope you brushed your teeth today."

"Please don't give me a hand job." The male whined. Alex rolled her eyes and pressed her lips against his once more, somehow kissing each other violently.

* * *

Mani and Mordecai were breathing heavily as they broke apart for air. They stared at each other before Mani opened her mouth to speak. "This has been nice and everything, but I have to go...do...something. Put me down now." He lowered her to the floor and took a step back while she quickly slipped out of the room. He stood in the middle of the room, looking around at everything on the walls for a solid five minutes before Mani stormed back into the room.

"Wait a goddamned minute, this is my room! Get out!" She yelled. He jumped and left the room with out complaining and winced as the door was slammed.

"What's her deal?" He said to himself as he looked at the closed door. He walked to his room and saw Rigby and Alex come up the stairs, both dripping wet and each with a arm full of sopping clothes. "What happened to you two?" He asked as they spotted him in the hallway. Rigby dropped the clothes he had onto the floor and looked at his best friend.

"Listen to this. This stupid ho'-"

"Nothing happened. Absolutely nothing." Alex said cutting off Rigby. She turned and looked at the smaller man and whispered something to him that left him pale before she reached and picked up the rest of her clothes. "And you!" She said turning back to Mordecai. "If I catch you doing something like the little stunt you pulled earlier with my clothes, you'll regret it. I know how to hide a body." She said ominously as she walked past him.

"Getting rid of them just got a lot harder." Mordecai muttered as he and Rigby rushed into his room.

* * *

**Co-Authored and Co-Written with Mani De Malice**


	5. Chapter 5

**Oh look, another chapter for you guys :)**

* * *

"Man, what are we gonna do about those two?" Rigby said as they walked towards the Coffee House. It was a three days after they had made out with their new co-workers and they couldn't believe they had done so. The only good that things that came from the make out sessions were that Alex and Mani could stand to look at them.

"I don't know dude. But they've been leaving us alone for now, so let's not push it." Mordecai answered as he pushed open the door. He smiled when he saw Margret dealing with a customer but it quickly turned into a grimace when he saw the blond guy from her party the other night.

"Hey guys, long time no see." She said when she looked to see who had just came in. "You guys remember Stephen, right?"

"Sup?" He said with a nod in their direction.

"Yeah. Hey." Mordecai answered back making his way towards their regular table.

"Whatever." Rigby said as he hopped onto a stool.

"Hey guys." Rigby sighed heavily as he heard the voice of Eileen. She walked over with a pot of coffee in her hand. She stopped at their table and gave Rigby a smile. She brushed some of her mousey brown hair out of her face as she sat down. "What's going on?"

"Hey Eileen. Nothing much." Mordecai said as he watched Margret and Stephen continued to talk.

"Nothing much?" Rigby repeated. "Dude, what about those two stupid broads that are trying to take over our live?!"

"What?"

"Oh, well, there are these two new chicks who started working with us and everything. He thinks they're trying to take over our lives." Mordecai explained.

"Because they are." He whined as he leaned his torso on the table.

Mordecai rolled his eyes and turned away from Eileen trying to talk to Rigby and turned his eyes to Margret and Stephan. He was thinking of ways to get Stephen away from the red head when he noticed something in the window. He looked and saw Mani standing there and looking at Stephan too. She noticed Mordecai's eyes on her and began making faces at him. He shook his head at her antics while she continued to make faces at him. He scoffed and turned away from the window to look back at Rigby.

"So, Rigby, um...I was wondering if you'd like, I don't know, hang out or something, later I mean, like not now or anything, y'know." She finished off with a nervous giggle.

"Lame." He said not bothering to lift himself off the table.

Mordecai shook his head as he took in Eileen's crestfallen face. "Dude, you can't-."

He was cut off by the door opening loudly and Mani walking in. She stopped momentarily when she saw Stephen sitting there and talking with Margret, before walking past them with a nod and going to sit with Mordecai, Rigby and Eileen.

"Mani." Mordecai said.

"Old geezer." She replied as she took a seat.

"Where's your shadow?"

"She's out shopping with Pops or something." She grumbled as she turned to stare at Margret and Stephan.

* * *

"Should we get string beans or green peas?" Alex asked as she held up a can in each hand for Pops to to inspect.

"Hmm...Let's get both!" He said with a giggle. She sighed and put them both in the cart, grabbing two more cans of each.

"Okay Pops, time to get some fresh fruits and junk." She said as she grabbed his hand and made him hold onto the cart as she pushed it forward.

* * *

"Man whatever. Who cares about her anyway?" Rigby muttered.

"Her who?" Margret asked as she and Stephan came over. Mani and Mordecai sat up straighter as they settled themselves across form them.

"The Midget is talking about Alex. She has to do chores and junk and she said both of us shouldn't have to suffer, so I'm basically free right now." She finished with a grin.

"Aw that suck for Alex, huh." Margret said with a small frown. Then she perked up a bit. "Hey, Eileen, this is one of my friends from school, Mani. Mani, this is my friend Eileen. And you remember Stephan, right?"

"Pleased to meet you." Eileen said as she gave a little wave.

"Sup?" Stephan said again with another nod.

"Yeah, hi..." She looked around as she thought of something to say. "So, uh...you like air?"

Mordecai snickered as Rigby started laughing all out. "Wow, real smooth, Mani."

"Yeah! Like your mom's bikini line because I like my women waxed!" She shouted as tried to shove one of them off their stools.

Stephan laughed at them and said, "Yeah, air's great. Where would we all be without it?" He asked with a smile.

Mani let a nervous smile bloom on her face and replied with an, "I know right?"

Mordecai started to clear his throat. "Oh sorry, I've just got this thing in my throat." He began to cough to clear his airways and coughed out, "Lame-o." Just loud enough for Mani to hear. She turned and swiftly pushed him over so he fell into Rigby.

"Omigosh, Mordecai, Rigby are you both okay?"

"Uh, yeah, we're fine." Mordecai told her as he stood up.

"Why am I the one who's always hurt?" Rigby asked as he rolled on his side in pain.

"Hold on I think we have some pain killers in the back." She said as Eileen help Rigby back into his stool. He snatched himself out of the short girls grasp and huffed. "I'm so outta here man, it's not even funny." He looked at Mordecai who was too busy glaring at Mani to notice him and grabbed his arm to try to drag him out of the store. Mordecai shrugged him off and he groaned. "Fine! Whatever man!" He stomped over to the door and stormed out.

"Okay, bye Rigby." Eileen said before the door closed. She looked back over at the other three sitting there and decided to go help some other customers that just walked in.

"Dude, what's your damage?" Mordecai hissed as he sat back in the stool.

"Oh sorry, did I hurt you and your little boy toy?" She hissed back as she got closer to him.

"Would you stop saying that? We're not doing anything with each other, for the last time!" He said as he got closer as well. They glared at each other as they steadily moved closer towards each other. They jumped away from each other when they heard laughing.

"Dudes, you both are hilarious." Stephen said between chuckles. Mani smiled as she turned to face him again, leaning on the table top and pushing her arms together to subtly enhance her cleavage. Mordecai huffed and turned away as he took a sip from his lukewarm coffee, while Stephen grinned and looked down at her chest. "You guys make a great couple."

Mani's face fell at the same time Mordecai spit out his coffee all over the floor.

"What?!" They both yelled. Mani turned her head to look at Mordecai, her eyes squinting as she glared at him. "Gross…" She muttered

"Hey, what's going on here?" Margret asked as she came back from the back room.

* * *

"Hello?" Rigby called as he walked in the house. "Sweet. No one's here to tell me no." He snickered as he walked into the kitchen and started to go through the cabinets. "Aw, what?" He looked through all of them, then looking in the fridge. "How the hell can we be outta food?!"

"Pops and Alex went to go get some more." Skips said as he walked in the kitchen.

"What? That'll take forever!" He whined as he walked to a wall and slid down it until he was on the floor. "I need food now!"

"Calm down, they'll be back in a few minutes." Skips told him as he closed the fridge that the smaller man left open.

"Yeah, but I'll be dead by the time they get back."

"I've come to find that no one is that serendipitous, least of all me." He rolled around to see Alex with two plastic bags in each hand. She put them on the table while Skips went outside to lift some of the heavier bags.

"What?" He asked as he pulled himself up, but not standing; He wasn't about to lift a finger to help her. She turned to look at him before rolling her eyes and muttered about him being an obtuse oaf. He grimaced and asked again loudly, "What?!"

"She said she's not lucky enough for you to die." Skips informed him was he entered the kitchen with some more bags. "And she also called you an idiot."

"Oh." He replied as he began going through the bags. "HEY!" He shouted as he realized exactly what she had said about him.

"Sorry was that too much to handle for your tiny brain?" She asked as she grabbed a chair and pulled it over to the cabinets to start putting away the canned goods she and Pops bought.

"My brain is not tiny you...you...UGH!" He looked away from her and rifled through the bags again. "I don't need this, I just want some food."

She hopped off the chair and reached into a bag near her. She picked up a bunch of bananas and broke one off before giving it to him. "Here." She said handing him the banana. He scowled at the piece of fruit and she rolled her eyes again. "What now? Can't your miniscule mind recognize a simple piece of fruit?"

"That's a banana..." He commented, lifting a finger to point at it.

"Yes, it is Rigby. Can you tell me what color it is?" She asked in a condescending tone, a sugary sweet smile on her face.

"Oh, it's bright yellow!" Pops said as he held a head of lettuce in his hands.

"Good job Pops, you can have one of the stickers we brought form the store in a few minutes." She told him looking over Rigby's shoulder.

"I want a sticker too!" Rigby said with a grin before he shook his head. "Wait, I'm not eating that stupid thing."

Alex sighed as she crossed her arms. "And why not, pray tell?"

"Cuz you probably poisoned it or something, you life-stealer!"

"You're still on that?" She asked. "Listen, there's nothing else ready for you to eat except the banana, so it you don't want to 'waste away into nothing'," She said using air quotes. "Then eat the damn banana." She said shoving it into his hands. She went back to putting the groceries away, content with ignoring Rigby while he was standing there.

He muttered hateful things towards Alex as he angrily peeled the banana, taking a large bite out of it before spitting it out in disgust. "What did you do to it!?"

She sighed again, not bothering to look at him. "I didn't do anything to it, Rigby. I didn't have time to tamper with it."

"Well you did something to it!" He yelled throwing the rest of the banana on the floor.

"Oh yeah. I brought, like the worst bananas ever." She said in a sarcastic tone, waving her hands around her head.

"Oh, don't say that. I'm sure they're not that bad, certainly not the worst." Pops said with a small frown.

"No Pops. Those are the worst bananas I've ever tasted and I have no intention of eating them, ever!" He stomped his foot for good measure.

"Oh look, the baby's throwing a tantrum. Do you need to be fed a bottle, little baby?" She asked as she leaned a little closer. He back peddled into the wall trying to get away from her. Before he could make a clean get away from the supposed crazy chick in front of him, the front door slammed open.

"Well you're an idiot that couldn't get a girl even if you were a master at getting girls!" Mani yelled as she stormed into the house.

"Yeah, and you much better right?"

"Damned right I am!"

"Really?! 'Oh, so do you like air?'" He said in a higher pitch, trying to mimic her voice. "Yeah, you're so good at picking up guys." He said loudly.

"Don't hate on my awesomeness!" She shouted.

"You're not awesome! There's nothing for me to hate on!" He yelled as he walked up the stairs.

"Don't walk away from me, you can't do that." She called after him as she went to climb the stairs behind him.

"I can walk away from whatever I want, you included!"

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah!"

They all heard a door open and slam shut upstairs before everything was quiet again.

"Oh my God, she's gonna kill him!" Rigby shouted before he tried to run after the two of them. But a hand on his shoulder stopped him.

"No one's gonna die, Rigby. But you gotta get your mess cleaned up." Skips said as he handed him a few paper towels.

"Whu- but Skips!" He whined to the older man.

"Look at it this way; you can do it then run up there, or you can not do it and someone hurts themselves and you get fired because of it."

"You should totally do the second option. Then my eyes and nose won't be assaulted by your beastliness." Alex said as she finished putting the groceries away.

"Huh?"

"She said your ugly." Skips told him.

"And that you don't smell good." Pops told him.

"ARRGH!" He shouted as he scooped the half eaten banana off the floor. He tossed it in the trash before bolting out of the room.

Alex waited until he was halfway up the stairs before she started to laugh to herself. "Watching him get angry is like watching a drunk three year old."

* * *

Mani grabbed Mordecai's hoodie and brought him down to her level so their lips could meet, as he guided them backwards into his shared room. She followed, a grunt of surprise escaping her mouth as they fell backwards. He rolled them over so that he was on top of her, and she shifted as she pulled away from her.

"What the hell?" She moved and untangled one of her hands from Mordecai's hoodie as she curled her arm under her back. She pulled out a smiley half eaten fish and wrinkled her nose as she stared at it. "No. Nope. Uh-uh. No way." She said as she flung the fish out of her hand. With the other hand she pushed Mordecai off of her and was surprised when she started to sink down without him moving. "What is this fuckery?" She asked as she continued to sink down. "What am I lying on?"

"Uh, Rigby's bed." He answered as he tried to hold in laughter at her predicament.

"Is it a fucking trampoline?" She asked. "And move your fat ass, I wanna get up."

He started laughing and was about to move off of her, when the door opened. "What are you doing to-...Get off my bed!" He shouted as he ran at them and threw himself at both of them. He landed on Mordecai who fell on top of Mani with a cry.

"Dude get offa me!"

"Get off my bed first!"

"Both of you old geezers get off of me!"

After five minutes, they had finally gotten themselves untangled and off of Rigby's bed.

"I don't need this! I don't need any of this!" She yelled as she stormed out of the room.

"Ugh, why was she in here in the first place?" Rigby asked as he put his half rotted fish back in the clothes that littered the small trampoline.

"Uh..." He rubbed the back of his neck before deciding to pace around the room. "Do me a solid and don't tell anyone what I'm about to tell you."

"Fine whatever, just tell me." Rigby urged.

"Okay, well...we were about to make out."

"EWW!" He said standing. "Why would you make out with her?!" He turned and looked at his bed and then turned back to the taller man. "Your were gonna do that on my bed!? Dude!"

"I know, I know. And I don't know why I was but I just...was, okay?" He said back as he went and threw himself face down on his own bed.

"Gross, man."

"Shut up!" He said throwing a pillow at him.

* * *

Alex walked up the stairs and into her room and saw Mani pacing there.

"What's wro-?"

"Did you know that old ass little midget sleeps with half eaten food in his bed? And that he sleeps on a trampoline?" Mani said loudly, not stopping to pause her pacing. "He probably saves it so he can eat it in the middle of the night or something."

"What?" She asked as she paled. "That's disgusting." She moaned as she clutched at her stomach. "I think I'm gonna be sick."

"Why? Are you pregnant?" Mani asked as she stopped moving to look at her friend.

"Mani, I have to tell you something, but you have to promise not to tell anyone else."

"Oh yeah, I'm totally gonna tell everyone. My best friend, my other best friend, my kinda sorta friend, that hobo that lives on the street corner, that crazy lady that walks her cat through the park every day, everyone in this room is gonna know about what you're gonna tell me." She said as she waved her arms around the empty space.

"Okay, I get it, just shut up and let me tell you." Mani raised a brow while she waited for Alex to speak again. "Remember when those idiots pranked us or whatever? And I made the idiot go outside and get my clothes?"

"Yes..."

"Well, we kinda...made out...in the fountain...and junk..."

"You whore!" Mani cried pointing at her.

"Don't call me a whore." She moaned as she fell back on her bed.

"Harlot, hussy, strumpet, floozy, tramp, lady of the evening!"

Alex lifted her head to look at the other girl with a grin. "What?"

"Shut up I'm calling you names!" Mani said, then paused. "Concubine, Jezebel, trollop!"

"Are you done?"

"Yeah, I'll let you know when I think of more." She answered as she sat on her own bed.

They were both quiet, lost in their own thoughts before Alex sat up again. "How do you know Rigby keeps food on his bed?"

Mani looked at the other girl, before proclaiming, "We shall never speak of this again."

"But-."

"NEVER AGAIN!"

* * *

**Co-Authored and Co-Written with Mani De Malice**


	6. Chapter 6

**Another day another chapter for you guys :D**

* * *

"Hey Alex, guess what?" Mani asked as she looked at her friend. Alex rolled her eyes as she place a finger in her book to hold her place.

"If you make another joke about me doing you know what with you know who, so help me-."

"You made out with a old, gross midget that keeps food in his trampoline bed!" She said with a loud laugh as she pointed at her friend. Alex looked at her before taking her book and hitting her on the back of the head with it. "Ow! Fuck you that hurt." Mani said as she rubbed the spot the book had landed on.

"Shut up, I didn't even hit you that hard." Alex told her as she opened the book and found her spot again. Mani was quiet for a few beats before she fell forward on the counter.

"I'm bored. This sucks, you suck. If I had to judge a contest of who sucks more: you or a leech or a fellating whore, you would probably win. Because you suck so much as I previously stated." She said. Alex rolled her eyes and turned a page in the book. "Also I'm bored- wait did I say that already?" Mani tapped her chin as she looked over to the other female. "I hate this stupid snack bar." She said as she moved around until her head rested in her hands.

Both of them were at the snack bar that day, and so far no one had bought anything from them. People had come into the eating area and sat to talk with their friends or take a break if they were exercising, but no one had some up to them to ask for any food. "Why won't these people buy anything!?" She shouted, causing the few people who were still in the eating area to look at her strangely before getting up and shuffling away. Mani scowled and hit the counter with her fist before yelling, "And don't come back if you're not going to buy something, hobos!" Her eyes followed the group as they made their way out of the snack bar section of the park.

"Ugh, this is like the worst job at the park." Alex whined as her eyes wandered back to the pages of her book. Mani turned to look at her and narrowed her eyes.

"This bitch, at least you're reading something. I'm over here high and dry." She started to complain but once she saw Alex was ignoring her she groaned and stared onto the horizon. She spotted a few other people coming their way. Mani glared as she noticed the attire of the individuals; she started to growl under her breath.

"Hipsters…" She whispered as she stared at them. They came closer and closer then took a seat. Mani tried her best to distract herself but the pricks started speaking loudly.

"So you guys going to Sophie's art show?" One of them shouted. Mani rolled her eyes as she turned away, trying not to get mad. "Yeah, your friend is an artist. Guess what? Nobody cares…" She muttered.

"I can't Brandon's showcasing his film on the plight of minority women in the workplace." The other replied. Mani tried to mask her rage by wiping the counter with a paper towel; she ended up ripping it mid wipe.

"Hey you guys, I was talking to Meghan about how the Velvet Underground was so much better than The Beatles and didn't sell out, what do you guys think?" The third male said loudly. Mani's eyes widen as she let out a vociferous groan.

"Are you people gonna buy anything or not!?" She yelled in their direction. She heard some of them whisper that she was uncouth and loud, as if they weren't being obnoxious and pretentious snobs almost seconds earlier. They got up from the table and made their way towards the bar and leant on the counter giggling.

"I dunno, you give free samples- Storm?" A male in thick black sunglasses said with a smirk. His hair was blonde with orange highlights; it was unkempt under a wool cap. His facial hair was just as unkempt. Mani sneered in his direction as she narrowed her eyes at him.

"You wouldn't know who Storm was if she rubbed her beautiful African titties in your face." She scowled leaning forward, glaring at the guy. He simply drew backward and glanced at his friends as he started to chuckle.

"No need to get p'oed. I was just messing around." He answered with a shrug. He turned to looked at Alex and raised a brow, he tilted his head so he can spot what he was reading.

"Crust this place blows, let's get outta here." One of the kids shouted, the others started to follow him as well. "Yeah Crust, let's split." Another chimed in. He waved them off and turned to back to Alex, smirking.

"So, you enjoy Hemingway?" He muttered in his deep voice as he gazed at Alex. She looked up from her book for a moment and shrugged.

"Every so often, I'm actually re-reading this." She replied turning her attention back to the page. He nodded as he moved closer to her, Mani glaring at him hard.

"You and I should probably read together. It'd be fun." Crust said with a smirk. Alex giggled a little as she looked back up, her face flushed; Mani rolled her eyes before shoving the taller girl away.

"She doesn't want to read anything with a dirty…scruffy… nerf-herder like you!" Mani stuttered angrily as she pounded her fist on the counter, she quickly retracted her hand and screeched in pain as she held it. He chuckled again and crossed his arms.

"Star Wars reference, I like it." Crust shrugged with a nod. "So how 'bout it? Give me your number and we can arrange it?" He turned back to Alex. She smiled again as she closed her book, Mani rolled her eyes.

"Are you serious right now?" She exclaimed but her noise was ignored as Crust took out a sharpie and started to write his own number on Mani's arm. She gasped as she tried to shake him off but by then it was too late.

"You can call me Crust, ask your friend my number when you want to give me a call." He said finally with a smirk and turned to leave the snack bar. The shorter girl scoffed as she tried to wipe the number off but she had no such luck. She turned to Alex and glared at her.

"You can be serious. He's even dirtier looking than Fagby." She growled. Alex reopened her book and shrugged with a smirk.

"I can't believe this crap." She grumbled.

* * *

"Are you ever gonna…" Rigby started and nodded before finishing the sentence. Mordecai raised a brow as he crossed his arms.

"Dude I just met her. Why would I do that with her?" He answered quickly. Mordecai rolled his eyes as he went back to picking up garbage from the park lawn. Meanwhile Rigby simply took a seat on the sidelines as Mordecai actually tried to work.

"I'm just saying, she's using her siren powers to suck your life force out of you and steal your life!" Rigby yelled. Mordecai glanced around and shushed the shorter male.

"Dude, don't go shouting my business around. And they're not trying to steal our lives, they're just crazy and evil but cute somehow." Mordecai said in an angry whisper. Rigby rolled his eyes.

"I bet she's trying to trick you like in that movie."

"What movie?"

"The movie dude! The one with the chick and she has teeth in her vag!"

"You think Mani has a mutation from a fictional movie based on a myth?" Mordecai narrowed his eyes at Rigby and glared in his direction.

"Yes! She's probably just luring you in so she can chomp your wiener off!"

"Yeah, no. You really don't make any sense Rigby."

"Fine, don't believe me Mordecai but watch, right in the middle of you two doing it- you'll get really into it and then CHOMP, your pickle is gone!" Mordecai simply rolled his eyes and went back to working. He groaned a little.

"That's not gonna happen. Besides me and her aren't gonna—"

"Aren't gonna what?"

Mordecai and Rigby quickly looked up to see Margret and Stephen coming towards them. The blue haired male turned around and put on a fake grin at the two. His eyes wandered to the two's hands, noticing that they were intertwined.

"Nothing, we were talking about this TV show me and Rigby watch." Mordecai lied with a nervous chuckle. Rigby rolled his eyes and got up to stand beside the taller male. Margret simply giggled as she leant on Stephen.

"Oh that's cool, you guys remember Stephen right?"

"No." Rigby blurted out, Mordecai subtly slapped the back of his head before turning to Margret and smiling.

"Yeah of course!" Mordecai said with a faux laugh.

"We're dating now. He's so awesome. You three should hang out more often." Margret said dreamily. "You guys would really get along." She added before kissing the blonde male's cheek. He looked to Mordecai, giving him a smug smirk. The blue haired male simply stood dumbfounded.

"Aw thanks babe. I dunno about all that, I mean I do feel pretty sorry for them but not enough to hang out with them." He said in a deep chuckle. "Maybe one day when I'm not hanging out with my real friends." He added. Rigby frowned and crossed his arms as Mordecai still stood wide eyed.

"Haha! He's so witty, don't you guys love it?" Margret giggled as she held onto him tighter; Stephen subtly pushed her away from him.

"What do you mean? He's not witty, he's just an asshole!" Rigby yelled angrily. Mordecai shoved his friend to the ground then gave his fake smile again.

"I think he's great Margret, I think that this whole thing is just great." He said, lying through his teeth.

* * *

"Dude, I don't think this whole thing is great…" Mordecai whined as he walked into the living room. Rigby groaned as he plopped down onto the couch, rolling around.

"I know Mordecai; I could tell by the way you were sniffling on our way back to the house." He grumbled, slouching in his seat. The blue haired male growled as he made his way to the couch as well.

"I wasn't sniffling! I smelt something bad, that's all. Have you been eating that damn fish again?" He gagged as he crossed his arms.

"Shut up! It's none of your business!" Rigby yelled. He flicked on the television and stared at it in a daze.

"The chick in the FIAT commercial is so hot…" Mordecai sighed.

"Who?"

"The model in the FIAT commercial… the Italian one?"

"I don't know who you're talking about Mordecai."

"Oh for god sakes, it's playing on the TV right now!"

"Well excuse me; I wasn't paying attention because you were talking!"

"Ugh, I've had enough of you for one day!" Mordecai shouted as he tackled the smaller male and started to swing at him as they rolled around on the living room floor. Rigby tried to fight back but as usual he wasn't doing too well in doing so.

"You're just mad because Margret is dating that blonde jerk!" Rigby yelled as he squirmed. Mordecai swiftly slapped him before squinting his eyes at the other.

"NO! I'm mad because you've been acting like a dick all day!" He replied, the two looked up when they heard the sound of the front door opening. They still rolled around as they heard footsteps coming into the living room. It was Mani and Alex who had come in just in time to see Mordecai straddling Rigby.

"Hot." Mani said lowly. "Boy don't we have great timing? Oh no no. Don't stop on our account. I'll be writing a fan fiction about this later." She smirked as she crossed her arms. Mordecai scowled before getting up and storming out of the room, shoving passed the two girls. Mani raised a brow at him then turned back to Rigby.

"What's his damage?" Alex asked lazily. Rigby groaned as he started to walk away from them.

"Oh, look at that, your man's walking out on you." Mani whispered to Alex. She frowned and punched the shorter girl. "Ow fuck you, you whore!" She began to rub her arm where she was punched and walked through the living room and into the kitchen. "Quit hitting me already."

"Then quit bringing that up." She said as she followed her and took a seat at the table. She watched as Mani rummaged through the fridge and cabinets looking for some food.

"No way. You made out with him, so I'm gonna bring it up." She said as she found a bag of chips. "You should've kept you lips to yourself, strumpet."

Alex was about to reply when the door opened and Muscle Man. He stopped when he saw them and said, "Hello ladies."Mani grunted and Alex raised a brow at him. "Have either of you seen those two losers? I need my projector back."

"What projector?" Mani asked after she swallowed her chips.

"Oh, it was awesome. Rigby like did something to Mordecai at this party and he wanted to pull a revenge prank, so I told him to throw his clothes in the fountain and then set up the projector to scare him." He explained, pride in the prank that he gave Mordecai showing in his voice.

"That was YOU!" Mani yelled throwing her chips down on the floor. Her nostrils flared as she remembered what had happened that night. She let out a shrill sounding grunt and slammed her hand on the counter, before letting out another sound of pain. Alex scowled as she rubbed her temple, trying to ward off a headache as she mumbled to herself under her breath.

"What's the problem?" He asked in confusion as he watched the two girls.

"YOU! YO'RE THE PROBLEM! YOU TOLD THOSE TWO ASS FACES WHAT TO DO TO US! DO YOU KNOW WHAT I HAD TO GO THROUGH?! WHAT SHE HAD TO GO THROUGH?! SHE MA-!"

Alex slammed her hand onto the table and both Muscle Man and Mani looked at her. The shorter girl frowned and started to open and close the cabinets in her anger.

"They played those pranks on you two?" Muscle Man asked.

"Yes you baboon!" Mani shouted again. "And now you have to help us get them back!"

"Whoa, hold on there, I didn't-."

"Doesn't matter." Alex said as she stood up. "You helped them, now you have to help us. Or at least give us some info."

"But I didn't know before!" He objected. Alex looked at him, and started to sniff. She began to blink rapidly as her eyes teared up. "Whoa, wait a minute. What are you doing?!" He started to panic as the tears fell down her face. She wiped at them, but more quickly replaced the previous ones. Her sniffing escalated as her shoulders started to tremble. She swallowed a few times, as she tried to cover her face, while Mani stared on with wide eyes. "Hey, quit that! Stop it!" He squealed as he backed away from her.

"I-I can't. B-because the humiliation I felt was just t-terrible, and I...I..." She covered her face as the sobs began, her shoulders shaking with the force of them.

"Okay I'll help, I'll help! Just cut that out!" He shouted.

"Great. No take backs." She croaked, popping back up with a deep breath. She quickly wiped her face and rubbed at her eyes a bit, tears notably absent this time around. She cleared her throat a few times, coughing once. She sat up straighter, folding her hands in front of her and crossing her legs under the table. "Now, what have you got packed away in that demented little head of yours?"

"Y...You tricked me!" He squealed. Alex raised a brow and Mani snickered.

"No way, dude. She conned you. You've been swindled! You've been had! Played into her plots! Fallen for her ploy!"

Alex turned to look at her friend. "Are you quite finished?"

"For now." She answered with a shrug as she went to sit next to her friend. She slapped the table lightly, and looked up at Muscle Man expectantly. "C'mon, let's get this over with so those old Ass-Faces won't mess with us anymore. This is getting old fast."

Muscle Man looked at them before he sat down. "I'm only helping you both cuz you tricked me." Alex shrugged her shoulders, while Mani said, "Whatever, just get on with it."

"Okay, so they like cake a lot, right?"

* * *

"This is pure genius." Mani said as she watched Alex stir something in a large mixing bowl. "Maniacal laugh. Maniacal laugh. Maniacal laugh!"

"Are you serious?" Muscle Man asked as he stared at her.

"You just have to learn to ignore her."

"You be quiet, you tramp." Alex rolled her eyes and continued mixing.

"Whatever."

* * *

"I'm bored." Rigby whined as he laid prone on his bed. He turned his head to look at the taller blue haired man and saw he was spread eagle on his bed and looking at the ceiling. "Dude?" He called not getting an answer. "Hey, dude." Rigby frowned and pulled himself up until he was sitting up. "Dude." He picked up half a grilled cheese sandwich from under his pillow and threw it at Mordecai. It hit him in the face, causing him to jump up and quickly fling it at the wall. It hit the wall with a wet splat and stuck there. "Aw man, I was saving that!"

"Ugh, what the hell Rigby!" He shouted as he wiped at his face with his hoodie sleeve.

"It's not my fault you were ignoring me." Rigby replied as he saw Mordecai stand up. "Are you still crying about Margret and what's his face?"

"First off, I wasn't crying." He said as he started to pace. "And next, I was thinking of a way to break them up. Cuz that dude's a total D-Bag."

"Yeah, whatever." Rigby said as he stood up. "C'mon. I'm hungry. Let's go see if someone made anything to eat."

Mordecai sighed as he followed Rigby out of the room. He paused for a minuted as he sniffed the air. "Dude, do you smell that?"

"Oh yeah, someone made cake!" They high-fived before rushing downstairs and running into the kitchen. "Aw dude, look!" There were 4 large cupcakes sitting in a tin takeout bin on the table, sitting out to cool apparently. The moved closer and took a big whiff, smelling chocolate and sugar in the air. "Score." Rigby reached to uncover the cupcakes when Mordecai stopped him. He pointed to a small index card before picking it up and reading it.

"Dude, look. **'Do not touch. Alex and Mani's'**." He read before looking back at Rigby. "Do you think we should?"

"Yeah, why not." Rigby answered before picking up a cupcake. "Besides they have like two more anyway."

"Well, I guess your right." he said as he too picked up a cupcake. He glanced at Rigby again to see that he had scarfed most of his cupcake into his mouth. He shook his head as he took a bite out of his own cupcake. He finished his quickly, licking his lips afterward and said, "Okay, now we have to- Rigby!" He shouted as Rigby ate another cupcake.

"What?" He said through a mouthful of the cupcake. He chewed a few more times before swallowing. "There's still one left. No big deal."

"Oh man, dude, now they'll know we ate them."

"Who cares what they know." He said as he looked back at the last cupcake. Before Mordecai could do or say anything, Rigby snatched up the last cupcake and ate it in three bites.

"Dude! Now they'll defiantly know we ate their cupcakes and you'll be sick later!"

"Psh, I could totally handle both of those broads with one hand tied behind my back. Easy as pie." Rigby said wiping his face off with his shirt sleeve. "What do you want to do now? Getting pie sounds good." They heard footsteps clomping down the stairs and looked at each other.

"I want to live, so I'm getting out of here." Mordecai said as he rushed out of the kitchen door.

"Wait for me!" Rigby called out as he ran after his taller friend. They ran and hid in the bushed around the house. They heard a commotion in the kitchen and ducked down lower. But they were surprised when neither girl ran outside to see if they were there. They waited about half an hour, before Mordecai frowned stuck his head out of the bushes to see if the girls had snuck out through the front to try and catch them. Rigby let out a small groan as he clutched at his stomach, writhing in pain on the ground. "My stomach..."

"Dude, shut up." Mordecai hissed as he looked around for any signs of Mani or Alex. "I don't see them anywhere. It might be safe to go back in the house."

"Oohhhhh..." He moaned again. "Can't move...my stomach..."

"Hmm. That's what you get for stuffing those cupcakes into your face." Mordecai said as he moved himself into a crouch. "Let's go Rigby." Rigby moaned again as he crawled after Mordecai towards the front of the house. "What's wrong with you?!" Mordecai pulled on his arm until he was on his knees, and let go of him when he he smelt something foul. "Ugh, did you fart? Dude, you have to say something when you do that." He waved a hand in front of his face to make the smell disperse into the air faster and looked down at Rigby who was now farting loudly.

"I need...I need...

"Dude?" Mordecai asked tentatively.

"A bathroom!" He yelled as he suddenly sprung up and half ran, half waddled into the house..

"Wait Rigby, what happened?" Mordecai called out after him, pausing as his stomach started to bubble. He played it off as him still being a little hungry as he followed Rigby into the house. He saw his friend run upstairs and heard a door slam. He was about to follow when Mani walked out of the kitchen.

"Hey, ass face, have you seen our cupcakes?" She asked, a smirk lighting up his face as she tossed the empty cupcake container from hand to hand. He looked at her and glared as he heard moans of pain coming from upstairs. "What's the problem? Forget how to talk in your old age?"

"You did something to those cupcakes, didn't you?" He asked as his eyes narrowed.

"Me? Nah, I didn't do anything to them. I didn't even make them." She told him as she went to plop herself on the couch. She looked over to him, looking him up and down, before both their eyes were drawn upward.

"THERE'S NO TOILET PAPER!" Rigby yelled which was quickly followed by a groan of pain.

Mani started to laugh loudly. "Oh my god, I was joking when I said we should hide all the TP."

"Yeah, well, what's done is done." Alex said as she came from out of the basement. She stared at him, then at a clock on the far wall. "What, did he eat more than two? He ate them all didn't he? He's such a pig."

"Hey he's your- Ow!" Mani started to rub at the spot where Alex pinched her. "I told you to stop that, you hussy!"

"And I told you to shut up about it." She answered back.

"Both of you are nut bags." Mordecai stated before he grabbed his stomach with a nearly silent groan of pain. Both girls looked at him, identical smirks on their faces.

"Oh, so you ate at least one. Great." Alex commented. "We have to thank Mitch for the info."

"What?! You went to Muscle Man?" Mordecai asked as his stomach started to react to the cupcake from earlier.

"And? You and Fagby did the same thing, only you tricked him into giving you a prank." Mani said with a shrug as she turned to look at the television. "We just got some info from him. Totally different." Alex was nodding along with her as she switched the TV on.

"I suggest you find a bathroom ASAP. Don't want to ruin your jeans, right?"

"Uhhh," He moaned. "You two are evil! And you'd better watch your backs from now on." He said as he clutched his stomach and ran out the door.

* * *

"I hate them so much." Rigby stated as he was prone face down on his bed. It was a few hours later and he had managed to leave the bathroom after hopping in the shower and rinsing off the diarrhea that were left on his skin. He didn't feel like putting on a shirt, so he was just in his jeans at the moment. "And I'm so hungry." He whined as he turned on his side.

"Shut up." Mordecai complained as he covered his head with his pillow. He had crawled into the house and up to the bathroom to shower after his ordeal outside and had come back to the room a few minuted ago. "How can you even think about eating after what just happened?"

"Because I didn't eat earlier." He replied as he slowly pushed himself up. "I'm gonna go eat something."

"Whatever dude." Mordecai said as as he pulled his sheet over his head.

Rigby walked out of the room and downstairs, noticing the TV was on and Mordecai and Rigby's video games were playing on the screen. He couldn't see who was playing, but he was mad enough to run up to the couch and jump over it to scare whoever was playing. He landing on whoever was playing his games legs and heard a short scream before a hand pushed him off the couch. "Hey!" He said as he looked up. He scowled as he saw Alex sitting there, with the controller in one hand and the other outstretched towards him.

"What the hell is your problem?!" She whispered harshly as she glared down at him.

"My problem? What's your problem? You're touching my stuff! And you pranked us!" He said and he stood up so he could look down on her. He noticed she had on a large shirt and her legs were bare. "Ugh, you're wearing pants, right?" She rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to the game. "Hey, gimme that!" He snatched the controller out of her hand and they both looked at the screen as her character died.

"Gee thanks, it totally didn't take me a whole hour to get to that level and that wasn't my last life or anything." She said as she crossed her arms.

"Yeah whatever. You shouldn't even be playing this since it isn't yours."

"Yeah, like that's stopped you form doing things before."

"Shut up!" He looked at the screen and frowned. "What level is this, I've never seen it before."

"Level 13." She said as she snatched the controller back and restarted the game.

"No way, me and Mordecai have been trying to get to level 13 for three weeks." He said as he plopped on the couch. He looked for the second controller and plugged it in when he found it.

"Hey, stop it, no, this is my game file, you can't play." She complained when she saw his character enter the game.

"Well it's my game and Mordecai's game system, so I get to play whether you like it or not." He informed her. "And move your legs. I'm like, on the edge of the couch." She moved her legs as they started to play, and it only took a few minutes for Rigby to die.

"Man you suck at this."

"Stop talking." He grumbled as his character re-spawned.

"Like, majorly bad at his." She commented again when he died again five minutes later.

"Stop talking." He said, his nostrils flaring this time, as he started to breath harshly.

"You're so bad, I need to think of all the words synonymous with bad to describe how bad you are at this." She paused for a second, trying to come up with something with grin on her face. "Abhorrent, abominable, appalling, awful, bad, beastly, detestable, disgusting, dreadful, frightful, ghastly, grim, gruesome, hideous, loathsome, lousy, lur-." She was cut off when Rigby tackled her into the couch and started to kiss her fiercely. She kissed back as she let her controller fall to the floor, and bringing her hands up to coil in his hair. Rigby pulled away to take a breath of air and Alex asked breathlessly, "Wait, whoa, hold on a minute. Why are we making out?"

"It was the only way to get you to shut up." He replied with a scowl on his face. He wiggled around on top of her, then said, "Why are girls so soft?" Alex rolled her eyes and pulled him back down to continue kissing.

* * *

Alex wrinkled her nose and scrunched up her face as sunlight streamed through the window and settled on her face. "No, natural light." She whined softly as she tried shifting away from it. She thought it was strange, since her and Mani's room only got sunlight at the end of the day before it set, but didn't think anymore on it once it was off of her face.

"Quit moving." She heard. She was content to ignore the voice before she felt someone on top of her moving and something poking her in her thigh. Her eyes fluttered open and she looked down in confusion, just seeing a head of short brown hair. She stopped herself from screaming, but didn't stop herself from pushing Rigby off of her. "OW! Hey!" He said as he blinked up at her.

But she was staring at the tent in his pants. He looked down at it too and noticed the hard-on he was sporting. "That thing was touching me!" She whispered as she pointed to it.

"Well who's fault is that?" He whispered back.

"Yours!"

They both stilled and looked up as they heard someone go into the bathroom before looking back at each other. "We never speak of this again!" Alex hissed at him before she quickly got up and went up the stairs.

"Wait!" Rigby called. She stopped halfway up and bent over the railing to look at him. "What do I do about this?" He motioned towards his crouch.

"Take a cold shower." She told him before continuing on her way.

"Aw, what? I took a shower yesterday." He whined as he fell backwards onto the floor.

* * *

**Co-Written and Co-Authored with Mani De Malice**

**Also, reviews are always appreciated. **


	7. Chapter 7

**Aki: New chapter just for you guys!**

* * *

"Okay everyone, listen up. We're gonna be have a little carnival here in two weeks to raise some extra money for the park, near the snack bar area, and apparently it's going to be a big deal. Skips, Muscle Man and Hi-Five, you three will be building some booths for the festivities. We have food from the snack bar, so we need some ideas for the booths. Any suggestions?" Benson announced as the park employees waited to hear their assignments for the day. They were all assembled on the front steps again, Pops, Skips and the girls in the back, Muscle Man and Fives in the middle and Mordecai and Rigby on the bottom steps.

"Oh, I think a bottle toss would be a splendid idea." Pops said with his hand high in the air.

"Yeah, and we need some little B-Ball hoops and prizes and stuff." Muscle Man said.

"I think we have one of those strong man games out in storage." Skips told him.

"Oh, man Benson, we gotta have rides." Rigby said as he got excited.

"Yeah, he's right. Are we gonna have a roller coaster or something?" Mordecai asked.

"We're going to have 2 bouncy house for kids and a Ferris Wheel." Benson told them as he looked at his clip board. "And a kissing booth."

"Eww gross, who're the losers stuck there?" Rigby asked with a roll of his eyes.

"Are you that stupid? Like honestly, are you?" Mani asked the short brunette.

"I'm not stupid!" He shouted. "I just asked a simple question!"

Benson raised a brow before rolling his eyes and shaking his head. "We're doing it, you unenlightened dolt." Alex choose to speak up then.

"That's even grosser." He said as he turned back towards Benson and crossed his arms.

"You're just all kinds of stupid today, aren't you?" Mani asked him.

Before he could talk back, Benson decided to put an end to the current conversation. "BE QUIET!" He yelled, getting all of their attention. "Alright then, I'm going to be switching it up a bit today, since it appears that there's been some trouble between a few of you." He looked at Mani, Alex, Mordecai and Rigby when he said this, before looking back at his clipboard. "Okay, so...Mani and Mordecai, Alex and Rigby, you four will be cleaning the snack area. The girls will of course be manning the snack bar as well, and after you two idiots finish cleaning up, you can clean out the fountain."

"Ah what?" Mordecai asked the same moment that Rigby stood up and said, "Why do we have to be stuck with them?!"

"I agree," Mani said raising her hands. "I mean, I don't want to work with an old guy, and I'm sure Alex doesn't want to work with a crusty old guy."

"We're not old!" Mordecai yelled as he turned to look at the shorter girl.

"I beg to differ." Mani told them as she crossed her arms. "Ass-Face."

"See? You want us to work with that?" Mordecai said while he pointed to the two sitting girls.

"Yeah, look at him, he's just a douche-y pile of ole bones." Mani commented looking at her nails. "And the other one is a tiny neanderthal that can't tell up from down."

"I don't care, you're working together or you're all **FIRED**!" Benson yelled at them. The three closed their mouths and sulked. "Now go GET TO WORK!" All four of them jumped off and ran off to their destinations before Benson decided to make good on his threat.

* * *

"Man this blows." Mani commented as she watched all the people walk by. "I got up an hour early to get smokin' hot for this?" It was two weeks later and the two of them, as well as the rest of the park employees were working the stands that surrounded the snack bar. Muscle Man was manning a game booth with basket ball shooting, while Pops was working the bottle toss and Hi-Fives was working at the ring toss booth. Skips was near the Ferris wheel working on a strong man game when not controlling the Ferris wheel, and Rigby and Mordecai were working a dunk tank that Benson had rented for that day. Benson himself was working at the snack bar and would take small breaks when the crowd would lull and walk around to see how the others were doing.

"You got up an hour early because you saw that scary movie last night." Alex said from beside her as she moved around on her stool. "And you just put on a low cut top with out your hoodie and blush."

"And I'm smoking hot that way." She said turning to her friend. "And no one's coming to our booth! What is this fuckery?!" She said loudly. A few people turned to look at the two of them. "Hey there, wanna kiss? Only one dollar. 4 quarters, 10 dimes, 20 nickles, 100 pennies!" She said as she looked at them. The people looked away and shuffled away awkwardly. "See? What's the deal with them? We're look hot and awesome." She looked at her V-neck Captain America tank top, cut off denim shorts and her hi-top sneakers, then at Alex, who was wearing a dark blue flower print skirt, a purple tank top with a white lace pull over and ankle boots. Mani sneered at her outfit. "Well, I look hot and awesome. You look like a smelly hipster."

"Yeah, I know. You've only told me about 20 times since we started setting up." Alex replied as she put her elbow on the stand and leant forward.

"Are we not showing enough cleavage or something?" Mani asked her. Alex shrugged and Mani rolled her eyes. "Hey, lean down some more and press your arms together. And show some more skin."

Alex glared at her friend. "Why, pray tell, do I have to show some skin?"

"Cuz I don't want to." She replied as she looked around again. "Hey, here comes Benson. Sit up, or get lower and show off your boobs." Alex rolled her eyes and sat up as Benson got closer.

"Hey there girls, how's it going?" He asked with a small smile in their direction.

"We've made a profit of zero dollars and zero cents." Alex said holding up a jar with heart and kissing lips stickers that said 'Pay Here!' on it. She put it back down and said, "We're not getting any biters, Benson."

"Aw, that's alright. You both only started a half an hour ago. I'm sure you'll have to start beating the guys off with a stick in a while. But until then, here," He got his wallet out and took out two singles and dropped them in the jar. "Just to get you two started."

"Thanks man, this will totally show them that we're desirable and hot pieces of ass." Mani said as she picked up the jar. She saw some people and held the jar above her head. "See that?! He thinks we're hot! You should totally pay for us hot pieces of ass to kiss you!" They quickly looked away and went over to the snack bar.

"Well, looks like I'd better get back to work. I'll be making rotations in another half hour. Good luck girls." He said before he walked away. Alex waved while Mani put the jar on the stand and mumbled under her breath.

* * *

"C'mon, you call that a throw?" Rigby yelled as the group of teen boys tried to toss the tennis balls at the target. "My grandma can throw better than that and she doesn't have any hands!"

"Dude, dial it back a bit." Mordecai said from outside the dunk tank. "Who knows what they'll do to you if you hit a nerve."

"Pffft. What can they do, they're just a bunch of kids." He replied before the seat he was on fell out from underneath him. He flailed around in the water for a minute before he pulled himself from under the water. He coughed and sputtered as he took a breath of air. "Warn a guy first! You could've killed me!" He climbed back onto his seat and shook the water off of himself while the teens continued to laugh.

"Whatever, geezer!" On of the boys said.

"I'M NOT OLD!" He yelled at them.

"Hey, wanna buy another bucket of tennis balls? Only 10 dollars." Mordecai asked holding up a small bucket of the yellow balls.

"No way." Another teen said. "We saw some hot chicks that are kissing dudes for a dollar, we're going there."

"You don't want do that." Mordecai said frowning.

"Why not?"

"Cuz they're ugly!" Rigby told them. "And they have herpes. And they stink! Like big time."

"Yeah, and they're nasty kissers, too. Lots of saliva and tongue." Mordecai said.

"Especially the one with the silver glasses." Rigby added with a nod. Mordecai looked at him and Rigby frowned and shrugged his shoulders. "So don't go over there. Ever!"

The teens shuffled around a bit and looked a little uncomfortable before they decided to leave.

"Hmph. Alright, that's like five more that won't go over there now." Mordecai said with a satisfied smile.

"Yeah, and when they don't make enough money, Benson'll totally fire them." Rigby said as he rubbed his hands together. "Then bye bye stupid Alex with her stupid glasses and her stupid soft lips!"

"What?" Mordecai asked.

"What?" Rigby asked back.

* * *

"This is just embarrassing." Alex said after two hours. The sun was high in the sky by now and other than Benson coming by every half hour, no one had even stopped by their booth. They would shoot the two girls dirty looks and walk right past them. She sighed and looked at the jar. There were 8 singles and two lollipops in it and they all came from Benson and Pops. "I feel pathetic." She mumbled as she set her head on the booth ledge.

"I gotta go to the bathroom, I'll be right back." Mani announced as she stood up and started to walk away.

"Whatever." She called back as she watched her friend walk away. She sighed again and closed her eyes for a minute.

"Slacking on the job I see." She heard and frowned. She opened her eyes and looked at Mordecai and Rigby standing there, both with their hands on their hips. She looked them up and down and sighed again.

"Oh joy, the blockhead brigade." She said as she stretched. "Did you come over here to make fun of us or something? Cuz if you did, you should wait for Mani to get back." She sniffed the air, then frowned as she leant towards them. She grimaced and recoiled from the two of them while fanning her face. "Gross! You both smell like sweat and hot dog water."

They heard laughing and all looked to the right to see Mani coming back their way.

"Whatever. When Benson see's how much money you didn't make, you both are totally outta here." Rigby said with a smug smile on his face.

"I'm sure." Alex said with a roll of her eyes. "Since he's the one that put all this money in here." She tapped the jar and then yawned.

"What's the matter with you?" Mani asked her.

"You woke me up an hour early and wouldn't let me go back to sleep." She said.

Mani rolled her eyes. "Yeah sure, blame me for all your problems." She turned back towards Mordecai and Rigby. Why are you geezers still here? I think the nursing home is that way."

"WE'RE NOT OLD!" Rigby shouted.

"Whatever." Mani turned to look at Alex, content with ignoring the two males standing there. "We have to resort to drastic measures. Time to pull out the big guns." Alex raised a brow as Mani reached into the jar and pulled out one of the lollipops. "Eat this." She said shoving it in Alex's face.

"How's that gonna help you?" Mordecai asked as Alex took the piece of candy with a sigh.

"Shut up and move!" Mani said getting up and pushing them away from the booth. They stumbled back and scowled at the short girl. She walked back over to Alex, yelling, "No, you have to eat it seductively!"

"How do you eat a lollipop seductively?" Alex asked taking the candy out of her mouth. Mani got closer and whispered something in her ear making Alex blush and shake her head.

"Do it! It's the only way to get money!"

"Then you do it!" She hissed.

"I can't do it. I have class and standards and shit." Mani told her as she took the candy out of her friend's hand and stuck it back in her mouth. Mordecai snorted while Rigby laughed at them. "Both of you go away. And you!" She said to Alex. "Do what I told you or I'll tell everyone about you and-."

"Fine!" She said around the lollipop. She rolled her eyes, then asked, "Wouldn't a Popsicle be better?"

"...I'll be right back." Mani said before walking towards the snack bar.

Alex threw the lollipop somewhere behind her and reached into the jar to get rid of the second one as well. "Ah, cop out! You're not gonna do it?" Rigby asked.

"Wha- NO!" She shouted as she narrowed her eyes at him. Mordecai looked at him with a frown and a shake of his head. "Why are you both still here? Go away!"

Before either of them could move away or say anything else, some guy walked up to them and said, "Hey, I heard you shouldn't be over here. They have AIDS or something." Before giving Alex and the now returned Mani dirty looks and walking away. Mordecai gulped and looked at the girls while Rigby giggled into his hand.

"WHAT?!" Mani yelled at his retreating back. "WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?! COME SAY THAT TO MY FUCKING FACE!"

"Whoa there Storm, cool it before you blow a gasket." Mani turned to see Crust and his gang of hipsters standing a few feet away and gazing everything they saw with distaste. They were talking amongst themselves and complaining about all the attractions there. Crust broke away from them and went to lean on the booth in front of Alex.

"How 'bout you go away and never come back." Mani snapped.

"Chillax, Storm. Just dropped by to see Hemmy." He said as he looked at Alex. She smiled and looked down with a blush on her face.

"Hemmy? Dude are you stupid or something?" Rigby asked him as he frowned. "That's not even her name."

Alex sighed and covered her face with her hands as Crust looked over to Rigby with a raised brow. "Did you say something? I'm afraid you'll have to say it again, I can't understand your uncouth prose."

"What?" Rigby asked as he narrowed his eyes. "Did you just call me stupid?" Mordecai sighed and shook his head.

"Shut up Fagby." She hissed at him and looked at Crust. "Take your stupid smelly friends and get outta here. We're trying to get money for our booth."

At that moment, one of the girls in the small group of hipsters broke away and walked up to Crust, latching onto his arm. "C'mon Crust. Don't you know that kissing booths are just a form of prostitution? It totally puts women down and just enforces the stereotype that they can be bought." She sneered at Alex and Mani as Crust tried to shake her off.

Mani gritted her teeth as she ground out, "Did you know that leeching off your parents to work on your nonexistent art is just being an unemployed cunt?"

"It totally means that you mooch off of them while you sit around and act like you're better than everyone else." Alex added with a smirk. She gasped and Crust finally managed to shake her off of him and started to chuckle.

"Bro! Where'd you go?"

Crust turned around and yelled, "Over here!"

"Oh no, you can't bring anymore of those pretentious assholes over here!" Mani said as she went to stand in front of the booth and chase them away.

"That's one I've never heard before."

She turned to yell some more but stopped when she saw Stephen walking towards them. She blinked and slinked back behind the booth. "Kisses are a dollar each." She said with a smirk. Mordecai and Rigby started to snicker at her actions and she turned to glare at them. "Go away or I'll hit you with my shoe." She hissed at them.

Stephen and Crust shared a laugh before Stephen said, "Hey, you're both Margret's friends right?"

Mani's smirk fell a bit and said, "Yeah, we met at her party."

"You both know Red?" Crust asked Alex and she nodded. The four of them kept talking to each other before Rigby nudged his taller friend.

"What?" He asked.

"Isn't that the dude you were crying over cuz he's going out with Margret?" Rigby asked in a low tone.

"Yeah, why?" He asked as he narrowed his eyes.

"Aren't you gonna tell her?" He motioned towards Mani and raised a brow.

"Well..."

"Why are you old dunderheads still here?" Mani asked the two of them.

"WE'RE NOT OLD!" Rigby yelled as he flung his hands in the air. Mordecai narrowed his eyes at Mani and grabbed Rigby before he could make a running jump for the two girls. The shorter male looked at his friend and asked, "C'mon man, I can totally take both of them with one arm behind my back."

"No way dude. I'd rather tell Benson that the two of them are here playing around with the two of them then risk our own jobs by doing anything to them." He told Rigby as he turned to walk to the snack bar. He stopped when he saw Benson walking their way with a scowl on his face. "Hmmm. Looks like we don't have to do anything but watch the fireworks."

Benson stormed over to the booth and looked at Mordecai and Rigby. "Why aren't you two at the dunk tank?!"

Both of them looked at each other before looking back at their boss. "But Benson-."

"Don't you but me! All you two had to do was be at the dunk tank and you two can't even handle that simple job! Get back over their or YOU'RE FIRED!" He shouted.

"What about them?!" Rigby pointed over towards the girls. Both of them had looked up when they heard Benson start yelling and they were now frowning at Rigby. "They haven't even made any money at all!"

"Of course they have." Stephen said as he reached into his wallet to pull out three 20 dollar bills, a ten and a five before placing them in the jar.

"Totes magotes." Crust said pulling the same amount out of his pocket. "And I'm sure that's enough for us to take the lovely ladies out for a while. Say, an hour?" He winked at Alex and she smiled at him while her face turned bright red.

"Wow, congrats girls." Benson said as he smiled at them. He looked at the watch on his wrist then back at the girls. "Well, you girls deserve a break, you've been at this all day after all. Go ahead and have some fun."

"Ah, what?" Mordecai asked.

"That's totally unfair!" Rigby complained.

"Life's unfair." Benson told the both of them. "Now stop dawdling, and GET BACK TO WORK!" He yelled before he turned and stomped off.

"Sucks to be you." Mani called as she and Alex closed down the booth and started to walk away with Crust, Stephen and their friends.

"So there's this party going on Saturday night..." They heard before the sounds of people and laughter drowned them out.

Rigby growled and was about to run after them and probably tackle one of them to the ground before trying to wail on whoever his victim was, but Mordecai held him back. "Dude, chill."

"Chill? Chill! We just got yelled at and have to do more work, and they get to go and run off after not doing anything!"

"Rigby, relax. We can just get them later. I've got a plan." He told his short friend as he dragged him back over to the dunk tank.

* * *

**Aki: Co- Written and Co- Authored with Mani De Malice**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Hey hey everyone :) Here's a new chapter. Sorry it took so long, but we got it out to you guys! Quick warning: There's a scene that could be considered a trigger warning for _sexual assault_. It's nothing too graphic, but it happens. It's also the reason we're bumping this story from_ T_ to _M_.**

* * *

"Ugh. I can't believe Margret is friends with smelly hipsters." Mordecai and Rigby looked away from the television and heard Mani and Alex before they came downstairs. The two of them had been locked upstairs in their room since they got off of work, and that was three hours ago. "They literally look like balls. I don't know how it's possible but they do. Sweaty balls. Like, I can taste it whenever Crust is around."

"I'm not gonna ask why you know what sweaty balls taste like." Alex told her as they walk down the stairs. "Plus, she only knows Stephen and Crust. It's no big deal." Mani was dressed in a tight band t-shirt with a larger plaid men's shirt over it with a little extra make-up and cut off denim shorts, while Alex was wearing a large gray button up men's shirt with a dark colored floral skirt on underneath that, some make-up on her face, and black fedora resting on her head as well. Alex looked over at the couch and raised a brow at Mordecai and Rigby. "Is that going to be the extent of your evening?"

"What?" Rigby asked as he paused the game to look at the both of them.

Mordecai rolled his eyes and said, "She wants to know if this is all we're gonna be doing tonight."

"Man, why can't you just say that then?" Rigby asked her, a scowl present on his face.

"I did say that, you moron"

"And in case you didn't know, she just called you stupid." Mani told him with a smirk on her face.

"Why can't you just talk regular?!" Rigby asked as he threw his hands up.

"Why can't you become more educated so you can understand the insults I'm throwing at you?" As she turned to look at him, she lifted a brow in challenge, waiting for him to explode so she could laugh.

"Yeah hate to interrupt, but we're gonna be late sooo…" Mani trailed off as she turned Alex back around and started to push her towards the door. "Later old losers. Us young people are going out to enjoy our youth." She turned and stuck her tongue out at them and formed her fingers in the shape of an "L" on her forehead before removing her hands from Alex's back and wiping them on her shirt. "Ugh I can literally feel the low standards for men radiating from your very being. Gross."

Alex remained silent as they walked out the door. Their voices got fainter as they walked away from the house. Mordecai and Rigby waited for five minutes before they jumped up off the couch. They ran out the backdoor and out of the park, ducking behind some nearby bushes and waiting for the girls to pass by.

After a minute, Rigby started to fidget. "Agh, Rigby, quit moving around." Mordecai said as he squinted in the dark at his shorter friend.

"I can't help it man! Why are we even doing this?!" He said loudly.

"Shut up, stupid!" Mordecai whispered harshly. "We're gonna follow Mani and Alex and then crash the party they're going to, remember?"

"Agh, but they're taking too long." He complained.

"Well duh. We took the shortcut, of course we're gonna get here first." He said looking at the opening to the park. "So just shut up and wait."

It was quiet for another minute when Rigby stood back up and looked over the bushes. "What the hell are you doing!?" Mordecai growled as he grasped the shorter male and pulled his body downward.

"What? I was just checking to see if they were coming. It's no big deal. They both wear glasses anyway, so they won't see me." He explained. Mordecai sighed heavily and shook his head, getting ready to explain why what Rigby had said was stupid when he heard talking coming their way. "Oh, look its them!" He said pointing them out in the gloom of the night. Mordecai aggressively pushed his hand down as the sound of their talking drew closer to the bush they were occupying. He covered Rigby's mouth to make sure their cover wouldn't be blown.

"...And I bet his dick is tiny! That's why he can fit into those skinny jeans, because there isn't anything there!" They heard Mani's voice clearly as they girls drew closer to their hiding spot.

"If that was the case, all guys who wear skinny jean have tiny dicks." Alex replied with a grin.

Mani was quiet for a minute as she thought then finally replied, "There are always exceptions to every rule."

"Of course there are." She laughed. "Especially when you're concerned, right Mani?"

"Yeah, cause I'm the awesomeness incarnate and shit. I'm the Jesus of being Awesome. I'm here to show people how to be as awesome as I am. That's why I'm so cool. Like, Chuck Norris and Morgan Freeman fucked and then X-23 came into the mix and before they knew it Lando Calrissian appeared and so did General Grievous and Princess Leia came in and got in on that shit as well. Before everybody knew it Thor showed up busting assholes and pussies and then Black Widow got pregnant and had me. That was my conception. That was how I came to exist. An orgy of awesome. " She said before stumbling over a crack in the sidewalk. "You didn't see that." She said as she straightened herself out.

"Of course not." Their voices started to fade after that, and when they didn't hear them clearly anymore, Mordecai and Rigby lifted their heads out of the bushes to see them turning the corner.

"Alright, so I think we can- UGH!" Mordecai pulled his hand away from Rigby's mouth and started to wipe his hand on his jeans. "Did you just lick me? Dude!"

"What? You wouldn't get you hand outta my face! You needed to step off!"

"That doesn't mean you just lick people's hands though." He told him as he started walking in the direction Alex and Mani hand walked off in. "It's just gross. Now I have to disinfect it when we get back home."

"What? Are you trying to say I got germs?" Rigby asked as he followed the taller male.

"What else would I be saying? Besides, everyone has germs. Yours are probably just dirtier than other people's."

"SHUT UP!"

"No, you shut up! At this rate, they'll hear us or something." He replied as he shot a narrowed gaze in Rigby's direction. "Now c'mon, they're crossing the street up there."

"Whatever. We could probably be doing something way more awesome than this anyway. Like see a movie-,"

"We haven't been paid this week yet."

"Or going out to eat-,"

"I just said we don't have any cash."

"Or playing one of our games, or something not lame!"

"Stop talking so loud!" Mordecai threw a punch that caught Rigby on his shoulder. Rigby yelled and tried to attack Mordecai, but the taller man put a hand on his forehead and held him back. "Are you done?" He asked as he looked at the suddenly tired form of his best friend. He looked around to see if he could spot the girls anywhere and cursed under his breath. "Nice going, dumbass. Now we lost them."

"What? It's not my fault!"

"Yeah it actually is your fault Rigby."

"Man, we can still find them. No problem. Then we make fun of them and watch them cry or whatever, then go home. No big deal." He said looking around. "Betcha they went this way." He said as he started to cross the street.

"Whatever man. If you're wrong, you're gonna have to pay for the next movie we see." Mordecai rolled his eyes as he reluctantly followed after his friend.

"Whatever man, let's just go."

"We can hear you…" Mani's voice muttered from behind them. Mordecai scowled when he realized the path they had been walking would lead them right to where they were hiding. Rigby stayed silent as he stared at the two. The blue haired male groaned.

"You guys are fucking weird." Mani added dismissively before she started to walk ahead again. "Now Alex, back to our conversation about Green Day and alien waffle hunters." She grumbled. Alex nodded as they began to finally disappear down the road. Mordecai groaned again in embarrassment. He started to walk alongside the bushes assuming Rigby would follow, and that he did. The shorter male wasn't quiet about it at all.

"Mordecai, its dark out here I can barely see. I want to go home. I didn't even shower for this!" The brunette whined. Mordecai swiftly elbowed him as he quietly stalked behind the younger females.

"Oh my god! Are we walking all the way there? Are we? Since when do we use our feet to get places? Using your feet is for chumps. Didn't you know that using your feet is for chumps? Are we chumps? Chumps!" Mani started to babble on as she scratched at her neck for a moment. "Alex, I think we might be chumps!" She squeaked, and strong sense of panic in her voice. Alex immediately pulled the shorter female by her collar and slapped her in the face.

"PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER WOMAN!" She yelled and Mani nodded in return. She cleared her throat before straightening out her clothing and nodding at Alex.

"Sorry, I drank coffee before I left the house."

"Oh Mani, you know what that does to you." Alex sighed as she began to walk once more. Mordecai held Rigby's mouth closed while he watched the events transpire. He saw Mani glance behind at them for a moment but he thought quickly and lunged into some bushes. As the blue haired male's head poked out of the bushes he watched a car pull up beside the two females.

"Ugh, what's that? The mother-ship finally came back to get them? Take them back to the planet 'gross glasses girls'?" Rigby grumbled angrily under his breath. The taller male grimaced before punching him in the shoulder. His eyes widened from the sight of a car pulling up beside the girls.

"Hey, you guys headed to Marg's pad?" A voice said. Mordecai quickly squinted his eyes from the sound of the voice. It was familiar but he wasn't sure where.

"Yeah, how'd you know?" Alex answered swiftly.

"You guys look like you'd know her." Another voice piped in. "We're going that way, hop on in." The two hesitated but soon Mani would swing the back passenger door open and climb inside. Alex stifled her actions as she watched the other's movements.

"Mani, should you really be going in cars with strangers?"

"Are you serious? Do you see what these guys look like? When's the next time hot dudes are gonna offer you into their car? Huh? Listen, I would follow these guys to a fucking peanut butter convention." Mani whispered passionately. Her final statement left everyone silent. Alex tilted her head slightly.

"Get it, peanut butter?" Everyone was as silent as before. Mani rolled her eyes.

"You know, fucking peanut butter, come on Alex! You know this!" She exclaimed. Alex's brown hues widened as she started to stammer slightly, looking away from the other female.

"Oh my god! I hate peanut butter! Get it? I would follow them to a place that sucks ass just because they're hot! Get it now?" Mani growled finally. Alex finally nodded her head in realization.

"Well they may be hot. But we don't even know their names."

"I'm Chad and that's Jeremy."

"Alright, scoot over Mani." Alex blurted out as she jumped into their car, slamming the door as they drove away. Their tires screeched on the street as they sped off. Mordecai stood to his feet and grumbled.

"Chad and Jeremy, those guys…" He started. Rigby stared up listlessly at the other male. The brunette groaned loudly before flailing in a circle around Mordecai. He was swiftly smacked in the face by the taller male and finally toppled to the ground.

"I get that you're bored but at least pretend to care." Mordecai muttered as he started to walk again.

"Ugh, but I don't care!"

"You definitely didn't listen to what I said. Mani and Alex are with those guys from a while back, Chad and Jeremy." The blue haired male brooded as he tucked his hands into his skinny jeans. He walked briskly ahead of Rigby. The stump of a male struggled to keep up with the giant. Rigby's face screwed up a little.

"Those guys were assholes." Rigby grumbled.

"Nooooo." Mordecai groaned sarcastically.

* * *

When the two had finally arrived to Margret's place, Mordecai was feeling even more peeved. Mostly because he knew he and Rigby weren't even invited to the party. The crowd was even bigger than the one from the last party she had, which made it even harder to find her… or Mani… or Alex. Mordecai lingered under the arch of the open doorway. The heat of the many bodies inside had been exuding into the hallway.

"Ugh it smells like hot hooker breathe and dirty balls in there." Rigby scowled as he held his nose.

"Dude, we have to go in. We have to crash the party." Mordecai said finally, not accepting defeat.

"Mordecai this blows, we can smell gross stuff at home! I still have that ham sandwich in my dirty clothes pile!"

"Ugh! I told you to throw that away, Rigby!"

"It's in case I get hungry in the middle of the night!"

"That's what the fridge is for, Rigby!" The two stayed silent as the walls vibrated from the music playing in the apartment. Rigby lowered his brown haired head and pouted a little.

"It gets too dark at night. I can't leave our room…" He whimpered finally. The conversation was interrupted by two staggering adolescents shoving through the crowd and finally outside the apartment where Mordecai and Rigby had stood. They smashed their faces into each other's in a sloppily and equally disgusting to witness 'kiss'. The two males cringed from the sight.

"I want to have your babies!" the female cooed drunkenly. Mordecai raised a brow as he watched the couple.

"Dude, you guys are like twelve. Who invited you?" He gagged. Rigby screeched before lunging at the crowd and going into the apartment. Mordecai's eyes widened as he tried to enter as well, his eyes scanning the crowd for the brunette.

"Wait Rigby! We have to stick together if we're gonna ruin the party!" The blue haired male shouted, it was for naught. Rigby appeared to be long gone.

"So, what would it take for me to put the pork steeple in the squish mitten, Armani?"

"Actually knowing my name helps. Having money also helps." Mordecai recognized Mani's voice, even with the music. He turned his head following the sounds of the conversation. In the corner of Margret's dimly lit apartment stood Jeremy, he was as tall as Mordecai. The male also wore thick rimmed glasses and either he had a terrible dye job or he had bleached his hair to no return, styled in a fohawk.

"What kind of music are you into?" He grumbled as he leant on the wall. Hovering over Mani, Mordecai tried to blend in the wall. Then he realized how stupid he looked, and then he stood very still. The blue haired male began to think that he was getting a contact high from somewhere because of his actions.

"I dunno. I like everything pretty much. Right now I'm really into stuff like Liz Phair, The Cranberries, Indigo Girls, Bikini Kill." Mani answered in her usual monotone.

"Those bands suck." Mordecai scowled. A girl beside him clutched her iPod as her eyes started to water. "Oh… I mean." He stammered. The female finally busted into tears before fleeing deeper into the crowd. The tall male cleared his throat before turning back to Jeremy and Mani.

"Aren't those lesbian bands?"

"I don't know?"

"Are you a lesbian?"

"What! I…" Mani paused as she rubbed her chin. "You know. I never really thought about it before." Jeremy shook his head as he hovered closer to her. Mordecai grumbled in fury.

"So, are we gonna…" Jeremy paused and nodded in her direction. "I mean drove you here and all. I've been a gentleman. I'm also smart; I have a degree from The Institute of Technical Technology." He muttered.

"I'll do it if you give me fifty bucks."

"Isn't that technically prostitution?" Mordecai finally chimed in.

"Uhh I don't think so." Mani said quickly. "Times are hard right now. The times, in the present. The present is difficult… for everyone. Including me."

"You have a job." He added. Jeremy squinted in the darkness, obviously drunk. Thankfully he hadn't recognized Mordecai and went stumbling into the darkness and heat of the crowd. Mani let out a groan before elbowing Mordecai in the stomach. He buckled as he leant forward.

"You're staying with me until I find somebody else to hook up with you cunt." Mani growled as she pulled Mordecai closer to her by his collar. She speedily let go and pushed him away then linked their arms and started for the crowd again.

"What! But! I was- I have to find Margret and Rigby!" He whined.

"Aw, sounds like both our nights just got ruined." She sighed. The two were silent for a moment then Mani leant over to sniff the blue haired male.

"Have you been smoking pot?" Her voice cracked slightly. Mordecai's eyes widened in the darkness.

* * *

"Here, eat this!" A girl yelled at the brunette. Rigby attempted to ignore the female as he was shoved around by the anonymous bodies of the crowd.

"Eat it!" She repeated, shoving something into his mouth. Rigby gagged as a chewy almost brownie like substance entered his mouth. He simply accepted the food offering at this point as he finally swallowed the last bit of it.

"That was actually pretty good, give me more!" He demanded.

"Give me twenty bucks and you can have the whole bag!"

"Are you crazy? Screw that! I can steal brownies for free!" Rigby shouted over the music, and then motioned back into the crowd, wavering through the mass blob of humans. Until he finally grasped the ponytail of one of the girls, He heard a shriek. Finally the female turned around, revealing it to be Alex. Soon after Crust draped an arm around her shoulder with a smirk on his face.

"Ew, Alex." Rigby grunted.

"What are you doing here you peon, you weren't even invited. You and Mordecai stalked us or something?"

"What is he gay? I met a gay guy once. He was okay." Crust stammered.

"STOP TALKING!" Rigby yelled as he shoved past the two. "I have to find Mordecai."

"Think I saw Mani somewhere talking with Jeremy and some blue haired guy over there." Crust commented, waving his arm towards the other side of the room, before looking in his cup and noticing it was empty. "Hey, Hemmy, I'm gonna go and refill. Be back in a minute." He walked away and Alex shot him a dreamy smile before quickly turned to look at Rigby again.

"I don't care that you followed us or that you're here, just stay away from me." She hissed, leaning in close to make sure he could hear her over the music. She grabbed his arm and he was about push her off when he stopped and looked at her arm. Her sleeve was rolled up and her forearms were exposed.

"Whoa," He whispered as he slowly reached out to touch her arm.

"Rigby? What's the matter with you?" She asked with a frown. She jumped when he touched her and pulled her arm away. "Cut it out!"

"But your skin is so soft." Rigby cooed, Alex growled as she shoved Rigby away from her. Rigby collided with the floor and didn't bother to move. Alex rolled her eyes and crossed her arms as Crust made his way back over to them. He stepped over Rigby and handed Alex a red cup.

"Here ya go, Hemmy." He said with a smirk. His eyes wandered down to the floor where the stub of a male had laid.

"The fuck is wrong with that thing?" He scoffed nodding in his direction. Alex covered her eyes in irritability as Rigby seemed to plank on the floor, upsetting other party goers.

"Who the fuck is this ASSHOLE!?" somebody yelled, obviously irate. Crust shook his head as he stepped over Rigby and grasped Alex's hand.

"Come on Hemmy, I've got a plan for us." He said leading her away from Rigby. She shrugged with a slight smile.

"I definitely can appreciate a man who plans ahead." She replied. Rigby shot up from the floor wide eyed.

"Mordecai! I have to find Mordecai!" Rigby screeched as he wavered through the crowd.

* * *

"Mordecai, get me a drink." Mani demanded, obviously tipsy. The blue haired male squinted at the shorter girl. She looked up at him angrily and shoved him.

"Do I have to say it again!?" She yelled over the music. He returned the shove and she stumbled backward, he ended up having to catch her.

"You don't need any more damn drinks, Mani." He answered sternly. She staggered as she poked his chest, Mordecai flinched slightly.

"If you don't I'll tell Margret that you avidly enjoy butt play." She said in a slur. The giant groaned as he abandoned her at the spot and headed for the table full of bottles of liquor and cups. He sighed as he poured himself a drink and swiftly chugged it. He then grasped another bottle and poured the liquid into a clean cup, he noticed Margret across the room. Mordecai stared dreamily while unknowingly letting the alcohol spill over the cup and onto the table. When the blue haired male finally noticed he jumped and took a few sips of the alcohol to even it out again. He took a final glance at Margret and sighed when he turned back to the crowd, moving closer to Mani.

"Oh what are you doing…?" He groaned from the sight of her. Mani had been leaning on a stranger's shoulder. The guy seemed to be unfazed. Mordecai shoved Mani and she stood abruptly.

"What?!"

"Dude why did you just let her do that?" Mordecai sighed as he handed the cup to the little woman and turned to the male she was using as a pillow.

"You mean that's not my girlfriend?" He asked in a slur. Mordecai stared at him in silence for a moment. The guy seemed to be serious.

"No." Mordecai said finally.

"Oh… later." The guy said hurriedly while disappearing into the crowd. He turned back to Mani to was sipping her drink slowly.

"Stop nursing it like a baby! Drink it so I can ditch you already!" Mordecai shouted angrily. Mani glared up at the blue haired male.

"You're not ditching shit, you tall-blue-haired-bastard!" She grumbled, she reached outward to poke him but ended up falling instead. Mordecai sighed irritably and Mani sprung up from the floor.

"I'm okay." She huffed, holding up her arms.

"How'd you manage to not spill your drink…?" He squinted.

"Mordecai!" A voiced yelled, coming in their direction. He turned swiftly and squinted in the darkness.

"Mordecai it's me, Starla!" The voice said again. Upon second glance he did realize it was Starla. She was wearing a dress that definitely wasn't her size, some stilettos and her hair was out with a bump on the top. Starla was almost as short as Mani and definitely wore too much make up but she seemed unfazed by the fact. Mani shoved past Mordecai and examined Starla.

"Oh hey, Starla." Mordecai said with a sigh.

"It's been a while, huh?"

"I guess."

"Who the fuck is this?" Mani wheezed as she moved closer to Starla. Starla squinted her eyes and glared at the smaller girl.

"I'm Starla, Mitch's girlfriend. Mordecai and I used to date too." She said with a smirk looking up at the tall blue haired male. Mani's face was blank for a moment before she busted into hysterical laughter.

"You? And Him? And you- HAHAHAHAHAH" She held her sides. Mordecai's eyes widened as he began to step away from Mani.

"Well, let me tell you, you two were a good ma-heh-match." Mani stuttered through her laughter. Starla looked none too pleased.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" She asked quickly. The short girl attempted to compose herself before answering.

"I'm saying that the loser-"She started, pointing at Mordecai. "And the Jersey Shore reject-" Mani added, nodding in Starla's direction. "Totes go together, for shiz." She finished laughing once more.

"Mani you're drunk…" Mordecai placed a hand on her shoulder, trying to pull her away from Starla. He looked at the other woman. "Starla, she's drunk..."

"No, she's dead!" Starla yelled as she lunged towards her. Tossing Mordecai like it was nothing. Soon, Starla had Mani in headlock. The tipsy short girl flailed around at the section of the crowd began to part.

"Mordecai! Help me!" Mani shouted, she looked up and saw Mordecai was already on the other side of the room. She scowled angrily. "You mother fucker!" She yelled, she finally squirmed out of Starla's grip and made a run for it through the crowd.

"Get back here you little skank!" Starla shouted. Mani squealed as she ducked into the crowd, crawling on her knees towards the nearest safe haven.

"Where'd that little twerp go!?" She heard, she let out another squeak when she finally found a door. She stood to her feet and quickly swung it open and dived into the room, closing the door behind her and breathing heavily. She leant back on the door and exhaled hard.

"Well well well..." said a voice across the almost empty room.

* * *

Rigby wandered into what appeared to be another bedroom, probably Margret's room. Judging by the décor anyways. His eyes wide as he glanced around the empty dimly lit room. "Mordecai?" He whined, as he spun. The brown haired male grew more paranoid by the second. He jumped when he thought he heard somebody enter the room. Rigby scampered into the closet and shut the door while he was inside. "They'll never get me in here!" He hissed as he began to scratch at his neck a little in the darkness of the closet. Mordecai stepped into the room and glanced around for a few seconds. When he saw that there was nobody there he promptly exited and headed towards the kitchen.

Mordecai walked into the kitchen, weaving through the crowd to get to the refrigerator. Once he reached the refrigerator, his phone buzzed in his pocket. He let out a groan as he reached for the phone and held it up to his ear. "Hello?" He muttered angrily.

"Mordecai!" He heard Rigby's voice on the other line.

"Dude, where are you?"

"I-I'm just so hungry right now." He whispered into the phone.

"Well, I'm in the kitchen, wanna come out and meet me? And why are you whispering?"

"I can't!"

"Why?"

"I'm hiding from…_them_."

"Who?"

"THEM!" He shouted. Then lowered his voice again.

"Rigby you always do this! Stop acting like a weirdo and come out!"

"I can't!" he cried.

"Fine, I'm coming to get you. Stay there."

"Wait!"

"Ugh! What now?"

"Could you bring me some French fries?"

Mordecai frowned and asked, "Where the hell am I gonna find fries here, Rigby?"

"I dunno! Please, I really need some fries." He whined. Mordecai sighed and simply pushed the end button before stuffing his phone back into his pocket.

Mordecai glanced at the counter, noticing a birthday cake. He raised a brow as he glanced around, and then shrugged before going off in his search for Rigby.

* * *

Mani turned around when she heard the voice form behind her. She smirked a little when she saw that it was Stephen. Mani flattened out her hair and adjusted her breasts in her bra, as she attempted to walk towards him sexily. Stephen returned the smirk. "What brings you here?" He asked.

Mani started to gyrate and swerve her hips in an attempt to beguile him. Stephen merely raised a brow and squinted at her. "What are you doing?" He asked the shorter female.

She stopped her motions and stared at him awkwardly. "I'm trying to seduce you and ultimately make you have sex with me." She said in her regular monotone.

"You don't have to dance to make me have sex with you." He told her as he got up and made his way over to her with a sly grin.

"Oh. I don't?" She asked as she watched him approach her.

"I just said, didn't I?" He asked as wrapped his arms around neck and pulled her up into a kiss. He pulled away and looked down at her. "Now this is about to get rough." He growled.

"Wha-?" Mani started as he grasped the top of her head, and pushed it violently towards his crotch.

* * *

"C'mon, all the cool kids are doing it." Crust cooed to Alex.

"Dude, we're like in our twenties." Alex told him as she tried to pushed him off of her.

"Aw, Hemmy, you know I feel for you. I just wanna feel inside you now. And around you. I just wanna feel you." He murmured into her ear.

She pushed at him again. "Is that what you tell those little high school girls when you finger fuck them?" She sneered.

"I don't finger fuck them too hard," He commented, then smirked. "Don't want to hurt them too bad. Plus, that's just a lead in to the final act." He sighed as she continued to struggle from under him. "Just c'mon, babe."

"No!" She cried. She tried kicking at him but he was settled in between her legs. He held both of her wrists with one hand, as he reached up under her skirt with the other. His hand rested on her panties for a moment and she screamed. "I said no!" She yelled at him, redoubling her efforts.

He frowned and yelled back at her, "Stop fucking saying no!"

She paused, an incredulous look on her face, as she screeched "NO!"

"Rigby, are you-?" Mordecai asked opening the door and stopping when he saw Alex and Crust on the bed. They looked back at the blue haired male, one pair of eyes shining with annoyance and the other pleading for help. "Oh, uh, sorry about that. I didn't see anything." He said quickly trying to close the door behind him.

"No, Mordecai, fucking help!" Alex shouted as she started to struggle again.

"Wha-what?" Mordecai stammered as he stared between the two. Alex opened her mouth to yell again but Crust quickly covered it with his hand.

"Oh you know. Just Hemmy being Hemmy. Ha! Don't you have, like, a gay friend to look for stretch?" The blonde male grunted as Alex wriggled underneath him. Mordecai raised a brow for a second.

"Rigby is gay? Well…" He paused for a moment. "That would explain why he's COMING OUT OF THE CLOSET! AHA!" The blue haired male chuckled loudly. Just as soon as he said his lame quip another male passed him from behind.

"Nobody thinks that's funny except for you…" He muttered.

"… I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU!" He said loudly as he shut the door behind him. He shook his head as he made his way down the hall. He jogged over to the next door and swung it open he squinted his eyes into the darkness unless he heard the sound of sucking and kissing. Mordecai flicked on the light only to see Chad and Jeremy making out. Jeremy swiftly pushed Chad away from him when the room was finally illuminated.

"UGH sick! You said you were a chick!" Jeremy shouted as he spat on the floor in drunken disgust. Chad smoothed his semi-long hair and wiped his mouth.

"No! I said 'STOP! I HAVE A DICK!'" He replied quickly.

"No wonder your boobs felt so flat!" Jeremy held his stomach as if he was about to vomit. Chad rolled his eyes and crossed his arms.

"I don't have boobs." Chad spat.

"WELL THEY'RE TERRIBLE!" Jeremy yelled. The two ceased their quarreling when they turned to see the blue haired male still standing in the doorway. He gulped as he gazed at the two.

"Hey, isn't that the bastard from that temp job we had?" The tall bleach blonde grumbled in a drunken slur.

"Yeah, that fucker! Let's kick his ass!" Chad cheered with a lackadaisical tone as he stepped towards Mordecai. He jumped up as he ran out the door, tripping on his way out and ultimately slamming the door behind him. He sighed and wiped his forehead as he kept walking down the hall.

"Gotta find Rigby." He whispered as he motioned to open another door. When the door opened Mordecai spotted two females kissing fervently. He smirked slightly as he stared at them. The women stopped their actions for a moment to glance at him but he didn't falter. They shrugged and continued to ravage each other.

"Oh man, when am I ever gonna see this again?" Mordecai whispered as he lingered there. He quickly shook his head. "No no no no. Keep looking for Rigby, Mordecai." He muttered as he closed the door and started walking towards the next door. "Man, how big is this apartment?" He muttered to himself as he reached the next door. "Rigby?" He called when he saw that the room was thankfully empty. "Rigby, are you in here?"

"Mordecai!" Came the muffled reply from the closed closet across the room. It opened a second later with Rigby tumbling out and babbling about food. "Did you bring my fries?"

"What? Oh, wait, I remember." He looked back down at his friend. "No." He told him with a shake of his head. He bent down and grabbed his arm, hoisting him up to his feet. "Dude, you look terrible." He commented as he took in Rigby's appearance.

"Mordecai, I'm so hungry." Rigby whimpered as he grabbed onto Mordecai's shirt. "You have to help me find some food. Please, Mordecai."

"Geez, fine, just get offa me!" Mordecai pushed him away as he started back towards the crowded living room, Rigby eagerly tagging along.

* * *

"Now I'm not saying this doesn't feel good or anything but, this isn't what I was expecting…" Mani rambled as she flinched underneath Stephen, who of course was ignoring her.

"Yeah! Woo! Yeaah!" He grunted as he roughly grasped her neck then used his free hand to spank her butt.

"Ow, that really hurts. Please…OW!" She cried once more as his grip on her neck grew tighter. Mani let out a small choke.

"See? This is exactly what I'm talking about…Don't be so hurty please…" Her voice was scratchy when she spoke. The tatted blonde groaned as he pulled the shorter girl's hair and placed his hand tightly over her mouth.

"No talking. In here your mouth is only good for two things." He breathed heavily. "Now, let's keep this party going." Stephen added as he attempted to lift Mani's short legs high into the air as he aggressively grasped one of her breasts and squeezed.

"Oh god, I can't bend that way—"

"OH YEAH!" He moaned loudly.

* * *

"C'mon, there's probably something in the kitchen." They both walked out of the room and back towards the kitchen, running into a limping Mani on the way there. All three of them stopped to look at each other before Mani broke the silence.

"Old losers." She nodded to them as she turned away from them and continued to limp on her way.

They kept staring, watching her struggle to walk, before Mordecai opened his mouth to ask, "What happened to you?"

"None of your damned business." She snapped, turning to yell at them only to groan in pain at the quick movement. "You now what? I'm done with this." She turned her head and began to scan the room. "Where the fuck is Alex, I'm ready to leave." Mani whined.

"She was in a room with Crust the last time I saw her. They were hooking up or something." The blue haired male replied quickly with a shrug. Mani swiftly turned her head as her eyes widened. She violently grabbed Mordecai's shirt collar and pulled him down to her level by it.

"SHE WAS WHAT? WITH WHO? AND YOU WERE WATCHING?" She yelled over the crowd, flinching slightly.

"Well, yeah. I don't know… He was on top of her or something when I busted in on them—" Mordecai's explanation was cut short by the sound on Mani punching him in the throat then shoving him aside. Mani tried to run out of the kitchen but wasn't doing a very good job. She had recoiled in pain by the time she made it to the hallway. Mordecai had ran after her, along with Rigby.

"Dude! What the hell is your problem! My neck hurts now!" Mordecai complained. The short girl slowly turned around with a sneer on her face.

"Oh no, your neck hurts. You know what hurts on me?" She asked in an angry whisper. The brunette and blue haired males exchanged glances before shrugging.

"MY EVERYTHING!" She yelled. "MY FUCKING HAM WALLET FEELS LIKE IT'S BEEN ANNIHILATED!" She continued.

"Wait, what?"

"And now, I have to find Alex and see if she's okay." Mordecai and Rigby continued to stare blankly at her. "And you two faggles are gonna help me." She added finally as she limped ahead of them into the hall.

"When am I gonna be able to eat?" Rigby whined loudly. Mani turned around quickly and shot him a death glare.

"You can eat my fist whilst I'm shoving it down your throat, Fagby!"

"STOP TALKING!"

* * *

Mordecai, Rigby and Mani approached a door. The tiny female glanced up at the lanky blue haired male in irritability.

"Isn't this like, the fifth room we've been to or anything." Mani spat angrily, she then quickly winced in pain.

"No dude, I'm pretty sure that this was the room." Mordecai muttered as he turned the door knob and pushed the door open revealing Alex In the corner of the room in a fetal position.

"Oh shit, what happened?" He asked as he jogged over to her. Rigby stepped closer as well.

"Dude who cares? She's just sitting on the floor. Can I go eat now?" He complained. Mordecai quickly punched Rigby's gut, causing him to fall to the ground.

"Nothing, go away. I wanna talk to Mani." She grumbled.

"Well she's right—" Mordecai started as he turned to point behind him but Rigby was the only one there now. He raised a brow.

"Mani was there a second ago…"

"WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER YOU PRETENTIOUS, DIRTY, LOUD, INSIDE BUILDING WEARING SUNGLASSES BASTARD!?" echoed from down the hall. Alex and Mordecai's eyes widened from the sound. The music of the party was switched off for a second and the whole apartment was silent. A blaring shriek rang in the air as Crust flew past the door and Mani dragging after him, finally climbing on top of his and viciously slapping and punching him.

"Aw what the fu—"

"I'LL KILL YOU!" She yelled. He tossed her aside and attempted to kick her away from him.

"GET STORM OFF OF ME!" Crust shouted.

"I WILL END YOU!" Mani growled.

Mordecai ran into the hall followed by Alex, Rigby still laid on the floor of the room. The giant male pulled Mani off of Crust then Margret finally emerged.

"Guys stop! You're ruining Stephen's birthday!" She cried as she ran to Crust's side.

"Mani, stay still!" Mordecai said angrily through his teeth.

"I will go all Phoenix Force Five on this bastard!" She yelled as she struggled in Mordecai's grasp. Stephen entered the scene as well moving closer to Margret. He wrapped his arm around her waist as he glanced between his beaten brother and Mani.

"C'mon guys, we're all friends here." Margret said finally trying to calm everyone. Mordecai released Mani when he saw that she had stopped spazzing and noticed that now she was just staring angrily at Stephen.

"Let's cut his birthday cake or something! Bring the mood back up and stuff!" Eileen called from the kitchen. The crowd roared in enthusiasm as Margret brought the group into the kitchen, finally Rigby had gotten up to join them but was having trouble getting near the cake. The mass of people began to sing happy birthday on Margret's cue as Stephen hovered over the cake. Mani and Alex stood side by side behind them.

"He's going out with Margret isn't he?" She asked through her teeth. Alex shrugged.

"Probably."

"I'm going to kill him." Mani whispered as the crowd sang.

"Wha?" Alex muttered.

"I'm going to kill Stephen after he cuts the cake, and then go to jail, and then I'll sing about how he had it coming like in Chicago… And everybody in my cell block will agree with me… Like in Chicago" She said in her monotone.

"Happy birthday dear Stephen! Happy birthday to—" The crowd continued as Rigby finally made it to the front, slipping under Stephen and sticking his whole hand into the cake. The crowd stopped singing and gasped. Stephen glanced at Rigby wide eyed and Margret let out a forlorn sigh.

"What?" He said with his mouth full, just after he shoved the chunk of cake into it. Margret lowered her head and covered her face with her hand whilst Eileen giggled inappropriately, only to be glared at by the beaten Crust.

"Mordecai left me in the room with Crust when I asked him to help me." Alex whispered to Mani. Her eyes widened once more as she jogged over to Mordecai then ferociously punched him in the throat.

"Ow! God-fucking-damn-it!" Mordecai let out in a pain filled gravelly whisper.

* * *

"So this time we all got kicked out of the party, which I totally don't even give a FUCK about anymore because this was probably the worst night of my life." Mani rambled on as she limped in the behind Mordecai and Rigby. Alex sighed.

"It hurts so much. Hey, Babe the Blue Ox… Carry me." Mani whined as she reached for Mordecai from behind, he slapped her away but she persisted until she was frustrated by his refusal to cooperate."Okay well FUCK YOU!" She shouted as she lifted her fist once more the squealed in pain as she grabbed her side. "I just want to go home." She whimpered, she raised her brow from the sound of loud chewing coming from Rigby. Since he had ruined the cake Margret just let him have it. Alex and Mani glared at him as he gleefully devoured it.

"This is all your fault!" Alex yelled.

"What? How?" Rigby said accidentally spitting cake bits into Alex's face. She wiped her face in fury as she started to paw at it.

"You imbecile! Give us some of the cake!" Alex demanded.

"No!"

"GIVE US SOME GODDAMN CAKE RIGBY!"

"Never! This is my cake! This has always been my cake."

"It was technically that bastard Stephen's cake first." Mani grumbled angrily as she crossed her arms.

"Dude, just give them some cake." Mordecai whined. The brunette male shook his head as he continued to eat.

"Give me the cake." Alex said through her teeth. Rigby attempted to gobble it up so there wouldn't be any left.

She growled as angrily slapped the cake out of his hands and let it tumble to the ground.

"NOOOOO! WHY?" Rigby yelled in agony. Mordecai groaned as he walked ahead of them.

"THERE! NOW NOBODY CAN HAVE ANY FUCKING CAKE!" Alex yelled. Rigby whimpered as he dropped to his knees, staring at his soiled cake. Mani limped over while chuckling.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE GROUND!" She yelled as she pointed to the ruined cake on the walkway. A car that had drove past did an illegal U-turn to where the four had been standing and rolled down it's driver's window.

"That was only funny on Saturday Night Live." The male shouted from the window, it was the same guy who dissed Mordecai's joke earlier in the night. He immediately sped off, abandoning the scene. Mani screwed up her face in irritability.

"Who the FUCK is that guy?" She asked as she flailed her sore arms in the direction of the speeding car.

* * *

Mani and Alex were in their room, Mani of course was pant-less. Both of them trying to recuperate from the terrible party. Mordecai and Rigby tried to take a subtle peek inside.

"Go away granddads." Mani called out as she examined herself in the mirror. The two stepped in anyways.

"Wow, you're bruised pretty badly." Mordecai said.

"That's what she gets for trying to fight dudes." Rigby grumbled right before Mordecai smacked him upside his brown head. The lanky blue haired male made his way towards the two girls and motioned to take a seat on Mani's bed.

"WHY!?" She shouted without even looking. Mordecai immediately shot back up and moved behind her and glanced at her reflection.

"When did Crust hit you in the legs?" He asked raising a brow. She rolled her eyes as she attempted to pull her shirt downward to cover to her thighs.

"He didn't."

"Well dude, why are you so sore and beaten up looking?" He inquired as he reached for her. Mani slapped his hand away as she started to limp out of the room.

"Leave me alone." She grumbled begrudgingly as she exited. Mordecai frowned a little then went towards Alex's bed. Rigby followed.

"Weirdo." He muttered. Mordecai shot him an angry glance and silenced himself. Alex had been sitting on her bed with her knees hugged into her chest. She glared at the two males.

"…What?" She asked.

"So, stuff got out of hand today." Mordecai started. Alex continued to stare at him angrily.

"Alex, I don't know what happened with you and Crust. Really I can only assume the worst but, I'm really sorry I wasn't there for you." He sighed as he glanced over to her.

"Your apology is currently pending approval, a rejection or acceptance will be notified to you by email within the next five to six business days." She replied. Rigby stared as if her whole sentence went over his head.

"Uh, well Rigby is sorry too. For being in a closet at the time…"

"His apology has been automatically rejected." She said over Mordecai's statement.

"Good! I wasn't sorry anyways!" Rigby yelled Mordecai shoved the brunette male and he stumbled. "Ugh okay! I was kind of sorry. Maybe." He groaned. Alex rolled her eyes as the door bell sounded from below.

"Dude, it's like four in the morning." Mordecai sighed angrily.

"That fagot with the dirty hair and sunglasses is at the door." Mani yelled from downstairs. The three exchanged glances as the door bell was rung once more. Mordecai finally hopped off the bed and headed out the room.

"Would kissing make you feel better?" Rigby asked not so subtly. Alex glared at him angrily as she narrowed her gaze.

"No." She replied quickly.

"Kay well, I've done all I can do. I'm getting out of here." Rigby replied just as fast as he exited the room as well. Alex rolled her eyes as he left.

Mordecai made his way down the stairs and finally opened the door, seeing Crust on the porch with a six pack of beer.

"Hey Stretch, where's Hemmy? I got this Pabst Blue Ribbon and my hot face and we're gonna have a makeup party in her pants!" He cheered. Mordecai stared blankly at the blonde then violently swung his fist into his face.

"Aw shit! What the hell! Ow, fuck dude!" Crust cried. Mordecai swiftly slammed the door in the dirty male's face. Mani stepped out of the kitchen and glared at Mordecai quizzically. He stomped over to her.

"Listen, I know you're a manipulative sociopath and you and Alex hate my guts but we're friends whether you like it or not."

"What the—" Mani squeaked as she narrowed her eyes at him.

"So deal with it!" He interrupted loudly as he placed a kiss on her forehead. Mani was stationary and wide eyed in awe. Just as soon as Mordecai turned to go back upstairs he went back over to her and slapped her boob.

"Ow!" She whined as she quickly covered it with her hand.

"And that was for what you did to me at the party. STOP PUNCHING ME IN THE THROAT!" He yelled as he finally turned and headed upstairs. Mani pouted as she massaged her breast and shrugged as she watched him leave.

"Whatever, bitch." She muttered as she twisted her neck.

* * *

**So there's the latest chapter. Hope all you guys enjoyed it and leave a review for us :)**


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